The first ten days elapsed so quickly, I still can't grasp the 'whole' of the new situation for us. But it feels good and I am starting to adjust to the practical feel of having my loves around. It's still a bit rough-and-ready for Lin, because we need another week to finish his room but that's just one part of the picture for him. So, to go from the start, what happened a week ago on Saturday?
Sward and I got up at half past two in the night and got ourselves ready to drive south to pick Lin up. He had started packing his belongings some days earlier and we stowed his things on our trailer in less than an hour. Lin's family was a bit reserved first but their twelve year old Saint Bernard broke the ice by burying his head between Sward's legs, staying like this for some minutes, getting a backrub that made him moan.
Lin's mother and grandmother got quite emotional when we left but we looked forward with anticipation.
I have been quite tense since the time I woke up so I quickly fell asleep on the backseat, listening to them chatting in the front. I was such a good feeling to just listen to their chit-chat and kind of confirm what I already knew: This was going to work. I fell asleep with a smile on my face as they told me later. It was already dark when we came home that evening. We hurried and unpacked Lin's things, went shopping, cooked something and fell asleep. As long as the room isn't finished Lin sleeps on our couch and stayed with him the first night. I have been switching between couch and bed every night but yesterday I drove Sward out of bed to claim it for me alone, because I did something to my shoulder, wherefore I am not able to sleep in a cramped place and needed some space. So, they slept on the couch together
There was so much to do during the first days, we were busy all day long. Even though we didn't had that much time for ourselves and Lin got a bit broody over this, I was happy with the thought: we have as much time as we want now, he will stay, we don't have to rush things anymore. During the first four days this thought got a second side to it as well for me. When Sward and I moved together in 2002 I immediately got cold feet because of the ultimateness of this step. It was the same again now. My stomach was rumbling quite a bit because I had to stomach the fact that Lin was there for good and that my life changes now.
One of the biggest changes isn't related to Lin. Because of the prospect of Sward losing his job we started to adjust our eating habits and save some money. We both never really cooked before. Growing up with fast food and packet soup, flavor and convenience food (living on pizza during the first year when we moved in together) Sward and I spent way too much money on food. Therefore I consulted my mother and learned the basics of how to cook without instant sauce and seasoning. And it works, we used half of the money that Sward and I used to spent for us two during the week Lin was there, while cooking for the three of us. And it tastes great
Speaking of Sward's job, the second half of his paycheck from August still isn't there and I doubt that his boss will be able to pay the one from September. I applied for a tutoring job and will meet my first pupil tomorrow. Lin is pondering on what he is going to do now job wise, because he never really worked or finished an apprenticeship because his heart threw a monkey wrench in his plans every time he started something. He has to start from scratch now and is considering a carpenter job, because he has always been interested in wood and designs. It is kind of discouraging for him to be an apprentice at the age of 29 but there is nothing to do about this.
Many things will change for everyone of us and I am looking forward to it. Our bonds are deepening and the one that makes me smile, every time I notice how great and deep the connection already is, is the bond between Sward and Lin who started to build a friendship that exists besides their relationship with me.
Life maybe not look that bright at the moment, but I am unable to feel discouraged by this circumstance.