Originally Posted by Magdlyn
No no. 24/7 lifestylers are not playing a game. Their D/s relationship is power exchange for the benefit of both, for growth and success in life. Subs need direction, their Masters/Mistresses love to give it. A good Master/Mistress is all up inside their sub partner's head, for the benefit of the sub. Some couples have contracts where the sub has to keep a journal with all their deepest thoughts and needs and desires fully documented, so that the M can read it and know exactly what is going on, to be better able to direct the sub to live in a healthy productive way. It's the opposite of abuse.
I never said it was abuse. In fact, I was trying to express the opposite: that both partners do it because they find doing it is fun.
I'm aware that our fun pursuits, if worth doing, aren't fun all the time. I am a professional musician now, but of couse all through my childhood and teenage years, I was learning to play violin. I loved it and it was fun, but it is also frustrating and can be very hard work. It takes many hours a day, and the kind of discipline and commitment where you're thinking about it all the time. But it felt worth it, because of the fun.
I don't see how I've just belittled lifestyle D/s to see it in the same vein. I just see lifestylers as more hardcore (less amateur) players of the D/s game. I don't think you understand that I think a game or a hobby can be very serious, life-changing stuff.