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Old 10-01-2011, 12:33 PM
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Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Metro West Massachusetts
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cuddlecakes View Post
I am a nice guy!

Eh, there may be some truth to that, but I think you're stereotyping.
If the shoe fits...

Quote:
This latest new guy definitely fits some of the bad boy archetype (except for the whole PhD thing...) I moan about how much better he is than me...
Big mistake! Check your self esteem.

Case in point: my gf miss pixi has a bf. (I'm a woman.)

M is tall, about 6'2." She feels so feminine walking around in public with him!!

He's rich, makes 200G a year!! I have a much smaller income. His apartment is bigger and nice than mine. He can afford to take her out to dinner whenever he feels like it.

He wears kilts with boots!!

He is originally from Spain and has a small but delightful Spanish accent!! A dashing Spaniard!!

He's only 35, to miss pixi's 34. I am 56.

He's a techno-savvy geek (like miss pixi). I'm pretty lame in that department.

He's massively endowed in the lap!!

Does this make me feel he is "better" than me? No way. I am well aware of my gifts and compatibility with her. I won't list my good qualities here, because that would seem like bragging, but I think I've got better than average self esteem.

Quote:
I felt mostly fine, even happy, about her seeing him last night because 1. This time I knew about it beforehand. 2. She spent the previous day at my place cuddling and reassuring and talking about stuff.

After the date she always calls and tells me how it went. Said she was so attached to me during the day she was having second thoughts about seeing him, was annoyed that he didn't show up on time, etc. It's not as threatening as I always fear it to be.
Well, good. Maybe continued evidence of the reality of her guys (they aren't perfect, neither are you, everyone is just human with the gifts and their annoying quirks and hangups) will eventually sink in with you.

Quote:
I do think of myself as a beta male, because my personality is so shy/meek/stable/cuddly. She calls me her "secret alpha male", though, brags to her dates about me, and several of them have expressed an interest in being cuckolded by me, which is... kinda backwards. o_O

But now we're way off-topic.
Well, I think your topic is a coverup for your real fears of being "lesser" than any Tom Dick or Harry she might happen to kiss once or twice.
__________________
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

There's no lying in polyamory!

I'm a 58 year old woman with 2 partners:
miss pixi, my live-in gf, 36 (together since Jan '09)
Ginger, bf, 61, married, lives nearby (together since Jan '12)

Last edited by Magdlyn; 10-01-2011 at 12:50 PM.
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