Yikes. I sorta fall between Nyc and the other posters. I think there could be legitimate reasons for this behavior that just need to be explored, identified and remedied. But I also think the fact that the gf doesn't see this as a problem is a major issue here... I mean, how would she feel were the roles reversed? I know I'd feel hurt and snubbed!
Regarding the D/s aspect, even people in 24/7 relationships need a safe space where they can step back from that dynamic and discuss things candidly as equals. Yes, I do believe in safewording for emotional/relational situations, not just sexual/physical ones. I think this is a big enough potential dealbreaker that you need to request that the two of step out of your D/s roles and work this out on egalitarian terms. Otherwise the power exchange might keep getting in the way of you really expressing what you need and her really hearing it.
Heck, maybe seeing you stop subbing, if only for an hour, will be enough of a shock to her system to make her think a little harder about what's going on here and what she might have to lose if she doesn't shape up.
Me, 30ish bi female, been doing solo poly for roughly 5 years. Gia, Clay, and Pike, my partners. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler.
Last edited by NeonKaos; 10-01-2011 at 02:03 PM.
Reason: merge posts