It's a benefit of being poly that a couple can at least flirt with others, and openly check out hot people on the street, with little to no jealousy. I know some mono people can also achieve this openness, but it seems kind of rare.
Does your wife know you had phone sex with another woman? Did you tell her that, before you tried it with her?
In my book, having cyber or phone sex without one's primary being informed and cool with it, is cheating. Maybe others feel differently.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
Mags (poly, F, 61) loving miss pixi (poly, F, 39) since January 2009, living together since 2013
also loving Punk (42, M) since Oct 2015 (he has recently downgraded us to friends)
"Master," (mono, 34), miss pixi's Dom for 2 years