Originally Posted by poobah123
So my wife says to me, "I don't feel THAT way for you". I asked her what she meant and she said she loves me but does not feel physically attracted to me. Meaning I do not arouse her sexually.
How do I handle this? I know it can be for a variety of reasons:
If the relationship works for you even with that, do nothing.
If the relationship doesn't work for you, you're gonna have to change things. Find out what does arouse her and figure out from there if it's possible for you to change something to where you do arouse her. If the problem is specific to you, then walk on and find a partner or partners who do desire you sexually. Or stay involved with her yet spend your attention building new relationships with those who do desire you.
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.
While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.