Welcome to the forums. I am a strong Christian woman myself. There's a book I read recently you may be interested in. It's called Divine Sex: Liberating Sex from Religious Tradition It really opened my eyes to some very liberating concepts.
The author, Philo Thelos, a Christian scholar coming out of a decidedly conservative background (sound familiar?), proposes to examine the Bible to determine what is and is not acceptable to God in terms of human sexuality. The answers he’s found show that Biblical sexual ethics differ widely from modern Christian sexual morality.
I'd love to be able to discuss this book with other Christians, especially Christian ladies, who have read it. If you would like to read it, I'll try to help you get a copy.