Originally Posted by JRiverMartin
I think you deserve much better treatment from him than you appear to be getting. What does it mean to you to have a "boyfriend"? Isn't a boyfriend someone special? How special is he treating you as a "girlfriend" when he won't open up enough with you to be willing to discuss so important a matter as this?--who he's seeing or sleeping with? I'd let him know that you feel that you deserve better treatment in this respect than you're getting. Also, do look at whatever self-esteem issues you've got which might lead to your cow-towing to such behaviour on his part.
Yikes JRM!! I don't want to have to take back my comment about you being awesome!! I understand and can appreciate your passion in this matter, however you're making some bold statments without knowing all of the facts.
My wife and I started this lifestyle through swinging. My point there is that she came to me one day and said I'd like to watch you with other women from time to time. I thought she was setting me up and told her as much. That wasn't the case, obviously, but this isn't a traditional lifestyle and one NOT accepted by most of society. Therefore I can understand (doesn't mean I condone what he did) where her bf was coming from. Not to mention, we're all human and make mistakes.
My wife and I have a level of communication now that we didn't have when we first started dating. I think it's pretty safe to say that most couples are like that. He didn't feel comfortable coming to her because he didn't want to lose her. Is that so bad? (Again, please don't think that I condone his cheating IF that's what he did. I don't know as that wasn't in the post, therefore I can't make ANY assumptions)
Also, I don't think it's fair to say that she has self esteem issues because according to YOU she's cow-towing to his behavior. How do you know that she didn't give him a good tongue lashing? Is it cow-towing because she didn't leave him?
I still think you're awesome JRM, but that response was a bit harsh especially without knowing all of the facts of their PARTICULAR relationship. I'm pretty sure they're the only ones that will have all of those facts. Hope you're not upset or offended by my response.