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Old 09-23-2011, 04:29 PM
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AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,286

Originally Posted by Ilove2men View Post
Sounds to me that you need input from your girlfriend. What does she want? He gave you control over you guys side of things, not hers so she needs to have a say in this. After all you are going to her city.
Excellent point! Handling the needs of multiple people takes all three of these things: honesty, sensitivity and negotiation. Maybe you could call or email her, tell her that bf has asked what you'd like for the trip and you've got some ideas, but you wanna see what she thinks and just go from there. If your vision is flexible and you're prepared to prioritize her needs, maybe let her make the first proposal and go from there. On the other hand, if your vision really reflects your needs and deviating from it would hurt you, maybe you should lay out your thoughts first and let her respond.

But either way, if she's an important person to either or both of you guys, she should get a chance to give input.

And congrats on the progress you guys are making in terms of healthy boundaries, trust, and honesty all around!
Me, 30ish bi female, been doing solo poly for roughly 5 years. Gia, Clay, and Pike, my partners. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler.
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