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Old 09-21-2011, 04:49 AM
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AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MrFarFromRight View Post
I think it's more likely that he just thinks she's not as important to him as you are, so that a connection with her is not going to be as complicated to deal with as getting in deeper with you. Because she means less to him, she's less likely to hurt him. She's safe. You aren't.
Totally possible! And, if it is the case, he may or may not be aware of it.

But honestly, as surprising as it might seem considering how much I've obsessed over it here in the past, I'm feeling content to not worry about what Eric knows/feels right now. He is warm to me and obviously cares for me as a friend, values me in his life, trusts me. I mean, don't kill me if I come back next week moaning about the situation again, but that's enough for me for now.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MrFarFromRight View Post
Wacky idea: Do you think that it would do any good for you to ask him to go over (talk openly about) his experience with Jen? Maybe one-on-one with you. It wasn't clear to me fromwhether you got this from Eric, Gia, or both of them. (I'm assuming that it wasn't from other people.) Maybe Eric could do with getting it off his chest without Gia around.
The story came out from them to me in a series of conversations, woven in with other topics, over the course of the first few months of my involvement with them, with occasional deeper pieces popping up after that. They were pretty thorough, looking back, even if it took them a while to get it all out. Mutual friends have also added some of their own perspectives to my understanding of the situation.

I could see asking Eric more about it, but I know it's a difficult subject for him... not exactly a "trigger" but certainly not pleasant... so I probably wouldn't unless there was something specific I wanted to ask.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MrFarFromRight View Post
a) This is only part of the situation. I can respect that he doesn't want to say "I love you". Can't he respect that you do want to say it?
Ha, not unless I tell him that I want to say it!

Quote:
Originally Posted by MrFarFromRight View Post
b) How does his "doesn't want or need an emotional relationship outside of Gia" hold up under his present emotional relationship with Bee?
I get what you're saying, but being open to the child you've always wanted is not quite the same as being open to a new romantic partner.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MrFarFromRight View Post
Speaking of whom, I am REALLY looking forward to your report on your first one-on-one babysitting session!

Hugs to you and Bee!
See the next post! And yay hugs.

Quote:
Originally Posted by MrFarFromRight View Post
Am I demonstrating just how out of the loop I am when I admit that I'd never heard of this group? After reading this post, I Googled title and band and came up with this video. thanks for the introduction!
You're welcome! Such a cute vid. And don't worry, I'd never heard of them either before they popped up on my pandora.com radio station.
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Me, 30ish bi female, been doing solo poly for roughly 5 years. Gia, Clay, and Pike, my partners. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler.
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