yes you understand correctly now. sorry for the confusion.
I have interacted with her twice. So while there is no 'friendship' or 'relationship' with her, I know he is truthful that she knows... and i have nothing but respect for her.
maybe therein lies my trepidation. I want to be 100% confident that what we do is the best thing for all 3 of us, not just me. Am I too worried about her feelings/concerns and not mine?