I am not sure I entirely understand....
To clarify as best I can, and please tell me if I am correct:
Maca has stuff he is working on and gets demanding about it and a bit beligerant. This you find disrespectful and hurtful and it makes you feel that you are unable to help because of this (I'm wondering if some of his issues started in his teen years as this would indicate a block of some kind during that time that kept him back from moving forward in communicating efficiently).
You would like to help him work on stuff more but feel unable until he stops this kind of behaviour.... he seemingly is unable to as he has always dealt with things this way and doesn't know how to deal with things differently.
If I am getting it then I suggest that you tell him exactly what you want to hear. Leave nothing up to his guessing, imagination or expectation. He can't read you brain and you can't read his, so perhaps saying things in the moment about how things make you feel and what you would like to hear would help....
I'm talking about the very words you want to hear.
My husband and I do that often as we are very different thinkers. I fly off the handle easily, he harbours stuff... we don't work well in the communication department so we hand it all to each other on a platter.
Hope this helps,,,, let me know if I am even remotely close?
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