The last thing i expected was a response never mind so many!
Thank you all
who have posted so far - it was really just a chance to put in writing (i did actually shorten it as didn't want to post my life story up!) and see in black and white what was going on.
I never intended to lay claim that jools was a villain or the 'bad one' but trying hard to stay objective whilst writing how i felt and still feel at times. I love jools with all my heart and know IF
we split up i would never be able to fill the gap. I don't want to split. M represents so many thoughts and emotions, that i will suffer if he and ladyjools were to become an item again. But on flip side Ladyjools will suffer he is is cut out. So either way one of us will be left hurting.
I've never asked jools to remove him or ignore him, but i did suggest that i would leave if she did see him. The last thing i wanted weas to seem like we were airing our dirty laundry for all to see - if i wanted that i'd apply for teh Jeremy K show!!
She said that she would see him regardless of how i felt, it was just a matter of time but that if we try to deal with my feelings on this now, then there will be no problems and everyone will be happy in long run.
Partly i was interested to see if anyone would respond to get an idea if anyone had had a similar situation and maybe they could offer suggestions.
I was given teh ultimatum of "If i suggest that its either him or me, she will choose him. If he suggests she choose me or him she will choose me"
Like i said before - i'm between a rock and a hard place