Originally Posted by RaspberrySurprise
Thank you for your input, I appreciate it.
He definitely does think there is something wrong with me for barely having a sex-drive. He makes that pretty plain.
As I explained above it could be hormonal or medical. Depression has been with me for sometime. I also take fluoxetine for it. plus I have PCOS which messes with my hormones. I wont go into the other medical issues on here but there are quite a few. I rarely am without a headache and am tired all the time.
You say that not all relationships are fairytale that get involved in Poly. Is it fair for us to bring someone else into our already very troubled marriage?
I would love the "daydream" notion that I could be her best friend and he could have someone to do s&m with. But how likely is that?
No. If you think your marriage is troubled, then it is not fair. There is a difference between less-then-fairytale-perfection, and someone who believes their marriage is troubled.
Daydream ? - Unlikely, but it happens. It seems many times, the worse the couple, the more likely they get a unicorn. Moths to a flame, I guess. Everyone ends up with baggage. Do you really want more baggage to deal with ?
Order of business : Look after yourself, find out about the fluctuating hormones and sex drive.
When you feel strong, deal with the husband, his wants and desires, and educate yourself.
See how things look much further down the road.