Originally Posted by trueRiver
No broody woman would accept being an auntie as anything other than a second best for being a mother, yet men are regularly asked to accept that being an uncle is "as good as".
I'm not sure if that's completely true.
I think motherhood is define by both genes and pregnancy. In your case what you want is the genes. There are women who are perfectly content to have the pregnancy without the genes (with IVF), others to have the genes without the pregnancy (surrogate mother) and yet others to have none (adopting).
Because men don't have pregnancy to begin with, all 3 are at the same level, but for women it might be different. It's quite possible that for many of them, it's the pregnancy experience that matters, more than the genes themselves.