Thread: Hello from NY!
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Old 10-26-2009, 09:28 PM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Alaska
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MRC-above all else-remember just as you have emotions and "baggage" in your life, so does your husband (and all of the rest of us too).

No one can say for sure what will happen with your marriage. Especially while he's feeling unable to talk freely. But that doesn't mean you can't keep progressing for YOU.
No person can handle living a different lifestyle for the sheer purpose of "appeasement" of a partner indefinately.
So please-don't force yourself.
DO be openminded-
DO face your own fears and concerns.
DO talk and read with us to get the most info you can.

But DON'T pretend to be something you aren't.

Many people think they are mono-and they aren't-they were just TAUGHT it was the only way. They can handle living mono or poly usually.

Many people just ARE mono (like Mono on here) and they may or may not be able to handle being mono in a relationship with a poly (Mono is, many can't).

Many people just are Poly (like me) and they generally can't manage to be in a mono relationship forever, though many may manage significantly long relationships that way.

But MOST people (imho) haven't a clue because they weren't exposed to the possibility of options in relationships.

Feel welcomed here, read other threads, get to know us-learn about yourself in the process. It will take you to beautiful places no matter what happens with your husband.
We all (including him) must keep growing, maturing and learning in life. It can be scary when we think that indoing so we might lose someone because of it-but really we can never MAKE someone stay and saying I DO isn't a guarantee. We have to give everyone grace to do whatever it is that they need to do to continue to grow.
Hugs!

HMA-you are sweet!
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