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Old 09-06-2011, 01:32 AM
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Kommander Kommander is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Detroit
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A Clockwork Orange

I've recently been having some problems in the relationship department (more on that later.) Mostly to do with Tom and Rachael (by "mostly," I mean "entirely.") Two weeks ago, I was venting on Facebook, and as a result, several people called me wanting to help me with my problems. Which, was kind of nice. I didn't know I had that many supportive people in my life. However, the first person that called me was my father.

Up until then, my father didn't know I was polyamorous. He knew I was involved with different women, but I think he assumed it was a series of brief casual relationships. I didn't want to tell him because I didn't think he'd approve, and that I wouldn't hear the end of his disapproval.

He was the first person that called me, and I really needed to talk to someone about what was going on. So, I told him everything to put the problem I was having into context. He took it extremely well, and doesn't disapprove of my preferred relationship format at all. Throughout the entire conversation, he was extremely supportive and understanding, and tried his best to help me. It was a side of him I had never seen before. It impressed me, and I told him as much.

He has changed over the past ten years or so; becoming much more easygoing. However, it's not really by choice. He's been having heart problems since his early 30s, and had a few heart attacks in his early 40s, at which time he had bypass surgery. He's also diabetic, and didn't start doing what his doctors told him to do until the past few years, which exacerbated his health problems. The way things are now, he has to be easygoing and understanding if he wants to continue living. If he gets worked up like he used to, at the very least he had chest pain.

My point is: becoming angry causes physical pain. This raises the same philosophical and ethical concerns raised by the novel and film that I stole the title of this post from. Has he actually become more understanding, or does he just appear to be due to inadvertent aversion therapy? And is it possible to tell the difference?

Ah well, he seems happier now. If he's faking it, that's his problem and he can deal with it as he sees fit. Although, he and I arguing less is probably a good thing, no matter what the cause.
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