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Old 09-05-2011, 04:39 PM
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Rarechild Rarechild is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: SW Michigan
Posts: 600
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TruckerPete View Post
One thing I'm finding a little difficult is that I am the primary source of comfort for Indigo and Mr. A.
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I certainly wouldn't want either of them to not be able to talk to me. And yeah, they're big issues. I guess I just don't know what to do with "their" stress after they share it with me.

Writing it here has helped, but further suggestions would be appreciated.

Not trying to solve or argue. Not taking their stress on as something you have to absorb. I know what you mean, and I have found myself taking disruptions and feelings of overwhelmedness personally.

I have been asked to look at acute distress as sickness, and comfort as I would if the mental pain was physical, which it can be.

I used to bristle at the words, "Everything's going to be o.k.", because, I would argue, maybe it won't be o.k., can't be. As in the case of someone's health, someone's death.

These days I find myself more able to hear these words and take comfort in them, even say them, because while the past and present may not be changeable, and the future uncertain, the blessing of another person putting their arms around you and being your friend, letting you rant or cry or stare,-is so precious. It has the power to make some part of the stress manageable and calm the panic without having to have the whole solution worked out in order to be soothed to a place of perspective.

Hope I made some sense. Take care.
-R
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