View Single Post
Old 09-05-2011, 11:46 AM
Magdlyn's Avatar
Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Metro West Massachusetts
Posts: 6,555

Originally Posted by trueRiver View Post
er, no thanks. The review snippets you quoted suggest that their culture totally invalidates men who feel as I do.
"Totally invalidates?" It's just a different and older world-view. I think it has a lot of value and interest, given the high divorce rate and all the dead beat dads out there in our Western culture. Certainly in some groupings we have today, where baby daddies are common (spread their seed and split), the mother, her mother and father, her sisters and brothers, hired daycare workers, school teachers, etc., are doing this anyway! I'm sure you've heard the saying, it takes a village.

I do not feel that my gender should prevent me having a parental relationship with the children who carry my genes:
If you were Na, you'd have a relationship with your sisters' kids, who also carry the family genes.

... the idea that this privelege only extends to women stikes me as profundly androphobic, shades of the 'utopian' ideas Sarah Gearhart was writing in the 70s/80s, ideas that to me are profoundly distopian.
You're looking at it backwards, man. Matrilineal groupings are an older idea and practice than patriarchal ones.

I am curious, nycindie, as to why you think the contribution to childcare by men like him (and hopefully in future by me) is less important than matrilineal care? I see this as a reverse-sexist mistake by another culture, not as an idea to emulate.
Again, Na men (and others in similar communities) would have plenty of opportunity for childcare, with their nieces, nephews and grandchildren. There would be no worries about caring for "another man's child" as the children would be seen as members of the tribe, not members of a small nuclear family. You could also look at it this way, were your SO to get pregnant by another man in your poly tangle.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

Mags (poly, F, 62)
Pixi (poly, F, 40) my partner since January 2009
Master, (mono, M, 36), Pixi's Dom/bf since April 2013
Reply With Quote