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Old 09-03-2011, 05:42 AM
Wiseacre Wiseacre is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Washington State
Posts: 5
Default polyamorous girl, monogamous relationship

Hi, I just spent several hours reading posts here, you all seem like a very helpful and balanced bunch!

I'm a bisexual girl who's likely polyamorous. I say "likely" because I've yet to practice it, though I will if the chance comes. The thing is, my GF of a year isn't. I know I'm capable of feelings for more than one person at a time (I was in love with both her and my now-ex) and she knows this, too, but she's not comfortable with it. There's been drama between us over this, that's just now settling. But I don't feel it's something I can change, nor do I feel it's something I need to change, but it's a contentious issue between us. Even though we've reached an agreement, I still feel like she can change the terms of it whenever she wants, without me being afforded the same option, since I'm the one who's interested in exploring relationships with other people. She's said that the only form of polyamorous relationship she can see herself in is a triad, but it's not something she actively wants.

Any advice on coming to terms with my polyamorous tendencies while in a monogamous relationship? I don't know if she'll ever be comfortable with it, and it hurts to think she might never understand this part of me.
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