Polyamory.com Forum

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-   -   Mono Woman Trying to Maintain Relationship with Poly Partner (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=9496)

ignonymus 05-03-2011 01:14 AM

Mono Woman Trying to Maintain Relationship with Poly Partner
I've been in a relationship with my current significant other for several years now. We were engaged for two years, apart for two years, and back together (secretly from our friends and family) for about half a year now.

I'm finding things difficult,as I am (probably) hardwired mono, and have trouble understanding his feelings, or those of our metamour. I've been reading a lot online, and have found this site immensely helpful so far. I signed up so I can use the Search function on the forums, really. I don't think I'm ready to post anything yet.

I would like to post along with my SO and his SO, but I haven't worked up the courage to ask them yet, and don't know how much they would be comfortable in revealing about themselves online, so I won't post any more details about our lives right now. I hope I can speak more with you all soon, though. Everyone here seems very nurturing and helpful!

Erosa 05-03-2011 04:07 AM

Hello honey!

Welcome and though i have been a very inactive member for a little while. (naughty me!) I am very glad you are here. :)

For my part, as a hardwired poly, but currently in an exclusively mono relationship, I can assure you that your love's being poly in no way diminishes his love for you. *hugs*

Look forward to many happy discussions with you! Hope we can make you feel at home!

ignonymus 05-08-2011 03:48 PM

Thank you for welcoming me Erosa! I know logically that our relationship is not diminished in love, but I'm still trying to figure out it's scope and depth. I'm going to keep trying to figure things out until I'm blue in the face, though! I've gotten permission to post whatever details I want about our lives here, so I'll be asking from help from here on in. :)

EDIT: I started a thread in the New to Polyamory subforum about my current struggles with wrapping my mind around the concept of polyamory and with remaining emotionally present in my relationship. It's here: (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=9694).

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