Polyamory.com Forum

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-   -   Newbie (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=9469)

Misjiff 05-01-2011 08:55 PM

Newbie
 
Hiya everyone.

I'm a total newbie to this. I feel like polyamory may be the 'thing' for me, due to various reasons but I'm not totally sure yet.

I'm 28, female from England. I'm also useless at introductions, so I'll leave it here for now.

AutumnalTone 05-01-2011 11:16 PM

Welcome aboard.

Masquerade78 05-02-2011 07:41 AM

Newbie too
 
Just to say I'm a newbie, 33 from England and in the same boat as you x

MrFarFromRight 05-02-2011 12:24 PM

Welcome to the 2 newbies! It's nice to see more members on this side of the pond.
Quote:

Originally Posted by Misjiff (Post 79544)
I feel like polyamory may be the 'thing' for me, due to various reasons but I'm not totally sure yet.

Curiouser and curiouser! Spill the beans...

Misjiff 10-14-2012 10:51 AM

Oh wow, I totally forgot about this thread! I'm sorry.

Quote:

Originally Posted by MrFarFromRight (Post 79586)
Welcome to the 2 newbies! It's nice to see more members on this side of the pond.Curiouser and curiouser! Spill the beans...

Well, the main reasons I feel it may be for me are:

1. I've never been able to imagine not being able to be with someone else if I had feelings for them, or understood why people don't do that anyway. One of my earliest memories to do with this was when I was about 8 and I saw some TV show where the boyfriend of one girl kissed another girl. I genuinely didn't understand why she was so upset. All I could think was "But he likes them both!"

2. The second reason is because I'm asexual, and part of me feels like it would be wrong of me to get into a relationship with someone, and expect them to never, or very rarely have sex. So I also feel I should allow them other partners to get those needs met.

3. And the final reason is, I don't believe one person can fulfill every need I have, and I shouldn't expect them to. Therefore, I feel it should be fine for me to seek elsewhere to fulfill needs that aren't being met, and vice versa.

Anyway, sorry for taking so long to answer!

JaneQSmythe 10-14-2012 11:57 AM

Welcome back!

Those sound like very valid reasons to me... #1 most closely matches my own reason - and the one that many who feel they are "wired poly" would seem to agree with.

While I don't disagree with #3 - which I would phrase as "I can't be someone's everything" a mono might argue that you don't need another romantic partner to meet those other needs - that's why people have friends.

There have been a number of posters recently where your #2 comes into play (and applies, I think, to my MrS to some degree).

JaneQ

Misjiff 08-18-2013 09:59 AM

Since I haven't really been here since I made these two posts I thought I'd bump it up to 'reintroduce' myself.

It all still applies so there's no point in retyping it :D

kdt26417 08-18-2013 05:33 PM

Glad to share the forum with you.

GreedyPaul 08-21-2013 09:09 AM

Other side of the pond.
 
I too am relatively new to poly. The open honesty is what attracted me at the start. I hope you are experiencing poly in new and wonderful ways:cool:


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