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Hello all. Not sure if this would really go anywhere else so I'll just put my story here.
I've been with my current girlfriend for about four and a half years now. Last year around our fourth anniversary we were having some difficulties due to my medical problems. I had been having an incredibly low sex drive whereas my girlfriend has an incredibly high one. I'd told her if she really needed to, we could find her a partner to help with that. She'd always told me no, no, it's okay.
One night she went out to a meetup of the GLBT club she was in at college. The next night when she came back she was being very quiet, ignoring me, hiding her computer screen, lots of things that raised alarm bells. When she left the room for a bit I snuck a peek at her screen and saw that she had been saying some very sexual things with someone. I asked her about it and she gradually admitted that she and someone from the club had hit it off and one thing led to another. I was hurt, mostly because she didn't consult me first. I'd always told her that it was fine if she needed a sexual release, as long as we talked about it beforehand.
I talked with the other girl for a little bit that night, and thought about it at work the next day, and (I forget how; it's been months!) decided that I'd be alright with both of us dating this girl. I broached the subject with my SO that night, and she was open to it, as was the other girl (G). Later that month we met, spent the night together, and parted for a bit. G decided that she couldn't handle dating two people at that time and we went our separate ways.
Jump ahead to late February, when I finally sign up for Facebook. G pokes me saying hi, and that she, her SO, my SO, and I should get together some time and catch up, since we hadn't really talked since then. I agree and nothing much happens until mid-March, when her SO breaks up with her. We make plans to take her out to a bar and help her feel better. We're there for a bit and the three of us are getting a bit more friendly than was planned. G says she never really stopped thinking about the two of us, and we admit that the reverse is true. After a couple more drinks, she asks to come back to our place. Things get a bit hot and heavy until she breaks down a bit, saying she still has feelings for her ex and she's not sure what she's doing. We comfort her and she goes home the next morning and spends some time thinking.
We talk a bit throughout the next week, with us telling her that we would still like to date her if possible and her saying she's open to the idea now but not sure if she can do it. She's worried about intruding onto the existing relationship with my SO. Last Friday we go to a movie and dinner, talk more and make out a bit more, and she says she needs a week to think about it and she'll give us an answer.
A week would be yesterday, and that's where we stand right now. Don't want to push her too much for an answer but I'm kind of anxious. So hi, everyone, glad to be a part of the forum!
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