Ive posted a little bit, and have lurked around even more.
Im pretty new to the poly lifestyle, at least for myself personally. Spent over a decade with Mom and Stepdad being poly, so its not an entirely foreign concept!
My husband is more interested in swinging, only wanting meaningless sex and never seeing them again (when he travels. too small of a town to do that here!) and I am dating another fellow, "K". I guess we have been seeing each other since…(thinking) February? Idk. Im bad at those kinds of things. Anyways, not too long, but only recently made it an official thing to where he is my "boyfriend" We had been interested in dating each other about five years ago, but different circumstances kept that from happening.
I do live in a small town. Population around 8,200 in town, prob 14,000 total on the island? And people see me with K a lot. And mouths have started opening and gossip has started. Got stopped in the store yesterday from my step-daughters mom telling me what she's heard. (Later confirmed to her, and asked her to help please smother the flames) We have been trying to keep our situation on the down low because of hubby's parents. Im pretty sure Ill be considered the whore of babylon, and my husband is either an unknowing victim, or struggling silently for our kids while I go out and be a whore. :roll eyes:
Hubby's dad called yesterday, and at one point in the convo he moved on to "Straying in relationships. And that affairs happen, its part of the human condition" I think he was trying to ease hubby into the idea that Im cheating on him.
I have no problem with everyone knowing, neither does K, and Hubby's only concern is all the grief from his parents. (only child, mamas boy, all kinds of family drama from the in-laws. We are always in a constant state of damned if you do damned if you don't"
I suggested that he just brings it up with dad, and tell him that he doesn't know what the situation is. And that hubby knows, and is ok, and that K comes over to visit, eat dinner, and take the kids and me out to the lake, playground, whatever. That hubby appreciates dad's concern, but everything is fine and he doesn't want to hear it if they can't accept it.
Hubby agreed. They're either going to gossip about how our marriage is ruined and Im an awful person. Or they'll flip out because somehow we think this is an "acceptable" lifestyle and gossip anyways.
My step-daughter (6) and hubby have decided that K is the substitute dad. (they came up with it!) Because K likes going out to the lake, playground, etc. And it gives hubby a chance to sleep (he works nights right now)
She was actually bummed, last night he was coming over but not til after bed time. So I promised her that he would come over again to play board games.
K brought his Xbox1 over, and Hubby played fallout on tv while K and I played titanfall on the xbox. We were all sitting together, with me in the middle. They seemed to have a good time. Nothing awkward or uncomfortable. They ended up talking to each other than with me by the end! Even when I had to go put my daughter back to bed (2) the conversation stayed strong and no hiccups. It was the first time K and Hubby sat down and hung out since we opened our relationship. They've known each other for a very long time, so its not like they were just introduced. Just never hung out in that kind of manner.
I know this first post is a huuuuge pile of words to sift through.
I wanted to start my own thread so I can keep track of whats going on, and hell, maybe get some input!
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