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-   -   What kind of physical touch do you like in a loving relationship(s)?~ (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=68455)

ColorsWolf 01-11-2014 06:49 PM

What kind or "levels" of physical touch do you like in a loving relationship(s)?~
 
Also what kind of 'level of privacy' do you like?~


This thread is about "levels" of "intimacy" and "privacy" of being in a "romantic loving" relationship.~ :)

Those listed above are just "examples" of "intimacy" you are comfortable with.~



Personally, 'privacy' when it comes to loving relationships doesn't exist for me, I see no reason we should keep any thing from each other if we truly love each other and we should NEVER 'get tired' of being around each other.~


I'm the kind of person, that I am all over some one all of the time or at least I think I would be: most of my relationships have never progressed farther than "online", but even with people I just met I am delighted if they want to hug me, usually I try not to touch people if I just met them as I do not know their level of comfort with such things.~


Slowly, over the years I have almost completely erased any sense of "personal space" for myself personally, although I still observe and often respect others'.~


I remember this one time when I first arrived at a huge college campus I was just hanging out and some one came up behind me and put their hands over my eyes and said, "Guess who?!" and I said, "Uh, I don't know." then they took their hands off my eyes and looked at my face and said, "Oh sorry, thought you were some one else." and I said, "Oh, that's ok, it's all good, bro. :)"


I have two dog brothers currently and I've had many non-Human family members and I cuddle them all the time, just to hold them in my arms their head nestled in my chest, I love it!~ ^_^


My ideal romantic loving relationship(s) is one where we are almost always touching some how, cuddling, nestled in each others' arms, holding hands, rubbing our faces against each others', rubbing noses, kissing each other every where light, soft, few, many, short, long, etc., nuzzeling each other, rubbing our bodies against each other like cats or dogs, etc. all in public, non-public, where ever we happen to be, to just do what we feel and say how we feel!~ ^_^


If I were to get into many relationships that have progressed to the point of meeting in-person, then I would want them to be the same way as the above.~ Also, we would all love each other and sit, cuddle, nuzzel, kiss, and sleep in one big pile.~


Sex doesn't have to be what every thing is leading to, but if it happens then it happens.~ ^_^

Inyourendo 01-11-2014 08:47 PM

Im very physical. I like pda, holding hands, hugging, butt slapping etc and I expect in a romantic relationship that my partner is the same way

london 01-12-2014 02:54 PM

I didn't vote because all are applicable. I like lots of affection but I also value my physical space too.

In public, I'm not really into heavy petting and groping in a completely public "vanilla" space because I think it's antisocial and consent issues can come into play. Casual physical affection is fine. Public sex in an appropriate space is fine.

InsaneMystic 01-12-2014 05:21 PM

Huge difference for me between real life and virtual contact. I'm pretty much worthless with interactions in meatspace. (So yup, I'm that oddball who voted in the lowest category. Different cities, or even countries, is a wee tad over arm's length... ;):p)

In virtual spaces (chat, phone, etc.), it goes up to the second - cuddles and the like. I enjoy the thought of these, a lot, and putting the thought into writing... but I get very uncomfy when it leaves the theoretical level and turns into actual biological skin pressure.

NewPerspective 01-12-2014 08:38 PM

It's too bad I can't vote for multiple options but I love hugging, cuddles, holding hands and pda.

ColorsWolf 01-13-2014 12:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by london (Post 257238)
I didn't vote because all are applicable. I like lots of affection but I also value my physical space too.

In public, I'm not really into heavy petting and groping in a completely public "vanilla" space because I think it's antisocial and consent issues can come into play. Casual physical affection is fine. Public sex in an appropriate space is fine.

Thank you for sharing that.~ ^_^

In my opinion: There is a difference between sexual activities and physical intimacy.~

Physical Intimacy is when you physically "give affection", it can lead to or turn into (depending upon the definition or perspective of) sexual activities but physical intimacy (depending on the level and type) is not considered by those involved to be a sexual activity.~

However: if any one here defines "intimacy" and/or "sexual activities" differently than I do, then please say so and explain in detail in this thread like london has generously done, although that is completely optional what ever you are comfortable with is fine.~

Thank you.~

Quote:

Originally Posted by NewPerspective (Post 257255)
It's too bad I can't vote for multiple options but I love hugging, cuddles, holding hands and pda.

That's not the point, these are just "examples" of "levels" of "physical close distance" to "show affection".~

Quote:

Originally Posted by InsaneMystic (Post 257241)
Huge difference for me between real life and virtual contact. I'm pretty much worthless with interactions in meatspace. (So yup, I'm that oddball who voted in the lowest category. Different cities, or even countries, is a wee tad over arm's length... ;):p)

In virtual spaces (chat, phone, etc.), it goes up to the second - cuddles and the like. I enjoy the thought of these, a lot, and putting the thought into writing... but I get very uncomfy when it leaves the theoretical level and turns into actual biological skin pressure.

Well said, thank you for sharing that!~ ^_^

Inyourendo 01-13-2014 12:10 AM

If im not romantically involved with someone (have a sexual relationship) I do not like to be touched at all. I know a lot of people who are touchy feely with their friends but I am not

Inyourendo 01-13-2014 12:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by NewPerspective (Post 257255)
It's too bad I can't vote for multiple options but I love hugging, cuddles, holding hands and pda.

Yeah I didn't vote either since all apply

nycindie 01-13-2014 12:27 AM

Really can't vote, since most of these could apply in different scenarios. No one is going to be at one level of physical expression, at all times.

ColorsWolf 01-13-2014 12:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nycindie (Post 257284)
Really can't vote, since most of these could apply in different scenarios. No one is going to be at one level of physical expression, at all times.

Thank you for sharing your opinion, but no one can speak for all people or any one but themselves.~

And yes, there are some people who have specifically said no matter how close in a loving relationship they are with some one(s) they are never comfortable with going beyond a certain point of physical intimacy, I have been on many forums before and I see this or some form of this often with people "diagnosed" with "Asperger's Syndrome" and similar things.~

But this is not limited to only people who are seen this way, this is not a "general all-applying to every one every where thing" otherwise there would be no need for a poll in the first place, this is an individual thing and I would like to hear every one's opinions.~


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