Polyamory.com Forum

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schizofish 10-10-2013 12:04 PM

New to this
Hi all

I am a straight, 40yo female living in Cornwall, UK. I have only recently (say the last couple of months) found this site and it has been very helpful.

I am just getting out of a 15 year marriage, during which time I was completely faithful - but I never stopped looking around, and felt guilty about that. Prior to that, in relationships, I either looked and did nothing, which made me feel unhappy, or I cheated, which also made me feel unhappy.

So finding this site was like an epiphany, or coming home - yes, there *are* other people who feel like me, and yes, they *have* found a way to live this way without guilt/fear/unhappiness.

kdt26417 10-11-2013 01:52 AM

Hello schizofish,
Welcome to our forum.

If only the world could know ... there are poly people everywhere, from all walks of life, from all races and cultures, and they are slowly learning how to make it work, despite the lack of support from the monogamous establishment. The point is, it's a real thing. It isn't just some pipe dream.

Hey, guilt, fear, and unhappiness plague us all, on some days and to some extent, though I'd call myself one of your more "nervous people." It takes awhile to get used to the idea that it really is okay to be poly, but the idea is simple enough. If all the participating parties know what's going on and consent to it, then it's really not a problem. Of course that means that honesty, communication, and objectivity are essentials for living a poly life.

Hopefully this site will give you the tools you need to succeed in polyamory, as well as the comraderie and emotional support that may be lacking for you in "the real world" where so many people don't understand. Check out our Golden Nuggets board and go from there. Post and let us know any time you have a thought, question, or concern for us. There's a lot of perspectives here, among which you'll probably find the input you need.

Glad you could join us.
Kevin T.

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