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-   -   Greetings from New England (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=52239)

Nudge 08-13-2013 05:59 PM

Greetings from New England
 
Well, it's been a fairly long road for me. I have only just recently (6 months ago) started dating after being married and monogamous for a long time.

My spouse had a couple affairs over the course of our marriage, and six years ago found her way to tell me that although she felt our relationship was going great, she kept being attracted to other people.

I did some reading, and the two of us did a lot of talking, and we agreed to try being poly. It took me the last six years internalize the change. Over that time, my spouse and I flirted with others, talked about being poly but functionally remained monogamous. My spouse might say she was biding her time. :)

Then about six months ago, a friendship of mine blossomed into a romantic relationship, allowing my spouse to feel more comfortable pursuing relationships of her own. My spouse and I get very different things out of being poly: I tend to be more hierarchical and paced, enjoying the opportunity to explore relationships with women; she tends to lead with her heart and is working through some big issues (addressing past abuse, exploring bdsm, bi-curiosity, etc.).

I just wanted to send out love to you all for living your authentic lives. I hope to learn from many of you. I also want to be a force for positive change in New England-- we aren't all dull and uptight!

northhome 08-13-2013 07:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nudge (Post 221723)
I also want to be a force for positive change in New England-- we aren't all dull and uptight!

Welcome! Never heard that people in New England are dull and uptight. Maybe that's why it's named after England (just kidding!).

Sounds like you're on an interesting journey of discovery.

Nudge 08-13-2013 08:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by northhome (Post 221737)
Welcome! Never heard that people in New England are dull and uptight. Maybe that's why it's named after England (just kidding!).

I would have laughed, but my upper lip is too stiff. :D

I guess I shouldn't have started by disparaging my region; I meant it mostly in jest. The poly scene does seem a lot less lively here than in most other regions, though.

gorgeouskitten 08-14-2013 01:13 PM

And your girlfriend is awesome. wink wink.

Nudge 08-14-2013 02:18 PM

Outed! :D

Well, New England does have some pretty sweet people <3

YouAreHere 08-14-2013 02:27 PM

I think less "dull and uptight" and more "unfriendly" is how we tend to be thought of.

"Welcome to New Hampshire. Now go away." :)

Of course, it's not that we're unfriendly. It's more of a "good fences make good neighbors" type of thing. Or so I like to believe.

Magdlyn 08-14-2013 02:47 PM

My gf, my bf and his wife, and I live in Massachusetts, but bf is from California and the rest of us are from NY. So there!

Nudge 08-14-2013 03:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Magdlyn (Post 221937)
My gf, my bf and his wife, and I live in Massachusetts, but bf is from California and the rest of us are from NY. So there!

Quote:

Originally Posted by YouAreHere (Post 221933)
I think less "dull and uptight" and more "unfriendly" is how we tend to be thought of.

Well, maybe MY particular state is a bit more staid (or steady, perhaps?). Also doesn't help that I work in finance. Bankers and their sort are not typically demonstrative.

Well, howdy neighbors! Look forward to hearing more from you.

kdt26417 08-15-2013 01:42 AM

Greetings Nudge,

Welcome to our forum from the friendly Southwest. :) It sounds like poly is starting to work out pretty well for you; I'm glad to hear that. I hope Polyamory.com proves to be a useful source of information and feedback.

Regards,
Kevin T.


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