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-   -   How to get past the jealousy... (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=45953)

cola87 04-29-2013 08:58 PM

How to get past the jealousy...
So I guess I'm not technically in a poly relationship, but my relationship with my friend is almost like one. I do have a bf and I would love to have a poly relationship with my best friend, but unfortunately you can't force someone to be in a situation which they aren't 100% comfortable with. I am super close to my best friend, it's more of an emotional connection (though we have hooked up in the past with my bf's knowledge, but not recently). I really love him. The thing is, he just got a new girlfriend. I really like her, she seems nice. I really want to be supportive and happy for them (I enjoy seeing him so happy with her) but the thing is, I can't help but to be jealous. He's in a new relationship and is wrapped up in it, I know it will eventually calm down, but it saddens me that he would hang out with me all the time and now he is constantly hanging out with her. I try to stay positive, but my mind wanders and I have thoughts of wondering why he wouldn't want to be with me and I get envious of their relationship. It's like an inner battle. I want to see him happy, but I get these negative thoughts about his new relationship even though so far I like his gf. It's so confusing! And I feel bad because my bf know's that I'm upset about it and I worry that he get's jealous of me and my friends relationship. But one good thing is that my bf helps me through it and trys to help my think a little clearer.

So to get to the point, how am I supposed to overcome this? I keep telling myself things will be fine and I'm just thinking too much. I do get over it for a bit, but then it still comes back. I feel bad that I'm even having this resentment. What do I do? :confused:

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