Lurking got boring
The people: C-me 28 f living with B and our furbabies & 1 roommate: A 30 f B-my fiancee 25 f swears she's monogamous J-30 m married to L, former lover turned best friend long before either of us met B or L L-22 f in a half open , marriage with J The Place: *B & I live in South Carolina, J & L live in Florida~approx 6 hrs drive The Circumstance: B & I are set to marry this July. *J and L married 4 years ago and have always had a half open marriage-open for L to other women for 'play'. *And apparenly L decided when she met B and me that she wanted to play with us. *J and I had grown a little apart over the years after he moved to Florida, *so I was not privy to their arrangement and didn't know L at all but after the birth of their daughter, J and L started making trips north to see J's family and friends here and even started dicussing moving here. *over the course of these trips we got to know L and really like her and J and B and I became closer again. Over breakfast one morning, it came out that J would not mind if all us ladies ended up in bed together. *I had fantasies about this through the years, but never mentioned anything figuring I'd be the only one interested. *B made it very clear in our early relationship that she did not share her partners. Ever. *Until she met L. Her attraction to L has totally shattered B's world view and she's having a rough time adjusting her point of view. *Now I'm having trouble adjusting to B's sudden changes and am not used to not being the hinge. *Oh the irony! *L decided that she trusted me and B enough that sleeping with J was not a threat to their marriage however, B and J have found that they don't wish to go there so remain more than friends but not quite lovers. *J and I on the otherhand are rekindling our old flame and admitted a year before we all got involved this way that the feelings we had for one another *never really went away. In the meantime we have been making all the trips back and forth that we can afford since our first hookup in December. *B is going south for a work thing and wanted to pick up L so they could spend time together. B and I would love to take our little group into a more serious set of relationships (future goal-still a little early) and although I believe J would be on board, none of us really know how L feels about it. *She did let us know when she started considering having a steady gf that B and I would always be her lovers, but that's as much as we can get out of her on the topic. *At least we know we are more than a conquest to her, but quite how much more, we cannot guess. B and I have only told 3 people about our involvement with L & J. *2 of them think we're crazy, although A (roommate) has been helpful in reassuring B that having feelings for L is normal and it's how she acts on them that counts.
This was supposed to be short and sweet, but at least my thoughts are now organized!
Welcome to our forum.
It sounds like things are in the very early stages for you, B, J, and L, and you will need to do quite a bit more communicating (the four of you together, whenever possible), before deciding what kind of a relationship you want with each other and how to handle things.
Polyamory.com will probably be a helpful resource for you; check out our various threads, and post any thoughts or questions you may have. A lot of support and collective wisdom here.
It's great to have you onboard.
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