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-   -   New to poly! (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=43727)

Sekhmet 03-29-2013 04:14 PM

New to poly!
Hi everyone!

I'm Sekhmet and my husband Q and I have been married for 5 years. We're mono, but I've told him from the beginning that I'd be open to opening up, we'd just have to talk about first. So, Wednesday, he brought it up. He and a mutual friend of ours (Miss M) have been flirting over text for ages, but in the last week, it's turned from flirting to FLIRTING.

I was a bit in shock since we've talked about it, but we haven't taaalked about it. I told him I needed to work through some feelings but I'm not saying no. We talked all day and I even talked to Miss M, who has been amazing considering that none of us have ever done this before. Q and I have felt closer than ever with all this communication, and our relationship was good before!

Q and Miss M are pretty deep in NRE, but Q is being wonderful when I need reassuring. I've had a couple of freak outs, but worked through the feelings with Q's support. He and Miss M are going out tomorrow night. He's promised no sex (PIV), but I set minimal limits otherwise. I'm varying between freaking out and being extremely turned on by the thought.

:-) I'm glad you are here so I can blabber on to someone!

Sekhmet 03-29-2013 05:13 PM

Aaaaand I just noticed this should have gone in Introductions. Sorry! If it can be moved, please do so!

Nox 03-29-2013 06:03 PM

Good luck! sounds like a fun start.

Sekhmet 03-30-2013 02:42 AM

I read the broken refrigerator post on xeromag.com today and told Q and Miss M that I'm not sure how broken my fridge is, but I want to find out before I tell him to buy a ton of food.

I think they both get it. I've also promised to actually work on fixing it. Texting extensively with Miss M today really helped me feel better. She said it helped her too!

Sekhmet 03-31-2013 02:29 AM

Well. Q just left for his and Miss M's first date. Then called me to report that his check engine light is flashing and the car is shuddering. So, he's headed back to our neighborhood to his parents' place to figure out what the hell is wrong. Apparently, he and his dad will figure it out in the morning and he'll borrow his dad's car for tonight. I find it really funny that he's borrowing his dad's car to visit his mistress. He's always teasing about going to see his mistresses, so when a friend asked if he wanted to do something tonight, Q told him he was going to be at his mistress's.:D

It's so surreal to us all, I think. Our marriage has never been stronger. We're communicating amazingly well. He listens to my fears and validates that we're his first priority.

I'm feeling a little nervous, but not bad. I'm working an overnight shift tonight and plan on bringing my Ativan with me, but that's mostly because I'd rather be over-prepared than under. Thursday morning I had a pretty full-blown panic episode. Q was great, and between him and talking to Miss M, I feel amazingly good tonight. Q's going to drop by work after his date.

Sekhmet 03-31-2013 10:03 AM

It's nearly 3am and Q just stopped by work after his date. I think it's safe to say he had a good time! ;)

He told me that he kept within my boundaries, and that they made out quite a bit. I had previously told Miss M that I was going to respect their privacy as much as possible and only ask for enough to make me feel okay with everything. I think I did that.

I told Q that I'm pretty sure that I'm ready for them to have sex whenever we find out her test results. I'm a bit of a stickler for this since Q is the only person I've ever slept with. Or done anything with below the belt. Yes, they'll use protection, but it still worries me.

Hope you guys don't mind that I'm using this to type out my feelings and everything. :o

Nox 04-01-2013 03:11 AM

I'm very excited for you! I'm glad it's going well so far, and your worries about protection are valid.

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