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-   -   New to Poly, and my feelings are mixed. (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=42994)

MrsStanley 03-18-2013 08:55 PM

New to Poly, and my feelings are mixed.
Hi everyone. Thought I should come introduce myself. My husband and I have been together 8 years married for two and have two children together. We have just begun our journey into the poly world and while he is enjoying it I am struggling quite a bit as I have been a loyally monagomus person all my life. It is a struggle, some days I don't think I will be able to do it. So we both have come here to learn, make some friends, and hopefully come out happier in the end.

nancyfore 03-19-2013 05:11 AM


It definitely takes a lot of communication... big hugs.. :)

kdt26417 03-19-2013 10:50 PM

Hello MrsStanley,
Welcome to our forum.

Sorry to hear that you are having a rough go of it so far. It isn't easy to let go of monogamy when you've invested so many faithful years into it. Give yourself some time; things will get easier little by little.

Hope you'll have a look around at our various threads, and post any thoughts, questions, or concerns you may have.

Glad to have you aboard.
Kevin T.

superdave 03-20-2013 02:37 AM


I see we have much in common by trying to cope with these feelings I know what you go thru I have

Been thruster into this lifestyle by accident however I do not regret it one moment. Its love and
understanding in the heart that helps.

SchrodingersCat 03-20-2013 06:03 AM

When you say you are struggling, what do you mean exactly? Struggling to cope with your husband dating other people? Struggling to give yourself permission to date other people yourself? Perhaps both?

There's nothing wrong with you continuing to be monogamous while your husband explores polyamory. Some people just aren't poly, and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Some partners pressure their loved ones to explore poly, just so they won't have so much guilt about doing it and leaving their mate at home. But that's not fair either. If your heart's not in it, then it's not in it.

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