Polyamory.com Forum

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-   -   Hello hello! (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=4218)

buzz13 11-14-2010 09:36 AM

Hello hello!
hey everyone,
i'm terrible at introductions, but er here goes! I'm a 19 year old male aussie, currently in a monogamous relationship. Been with her for 6 months officially, but known her for about a year now. This is my first relationship i've ever been in properly, and kind of stumbled across polyamory as I got slightly disillusioned with monogamy. I'm very analytical, and I started thinking about all the assumptions monogamy makes, and how it kind of forces unnatural rules on our approach to love, and is backed with justifications that don't always make sense. I've found that polyamory (at least in theory) seems much more 'right' to me. I'm sticking with my relationship because I love my girlfriend, and I know that suggesting polyamory would offend her and she would be unable to do something like that. So, faced with the choice of her or polyamory, I'm sticking with her. Though I thought I'd join here to start reading/talking more about it, and continue exploring this concept, because I hope to incorporate polyamory into my lifestyle in the future.

Thanks for reading

glowinthedarkstars 11-15-2010 01:01 AM

Wow. How interesting this must be for you. While polyamory certaintly has its benefits remember that somethings that seem right in theory aren't always whats best for you in practice. If you love the one you are with I would suggest staying with her while continuing to explore polyamory on a theoretical level. Possibly one day having this discussion with her. I haven't been in your situation personally, its just my two cents
Best of luck and welcome to the forums!:D

buzz13 11-15-2010 02:40 AM

Yeah, I think that's kind of what I'm here for. I'm happy to stay monogamous for this relationship but I wan't to explore polyamory on a theoretical level, and start thinking about if it's something i'm even capable of. I think it takes a certain amount of self-awareness which I am abundant in! I've also started trying to address jealousy etc in my relationship, to see if I can remove those kind of feelings. It's difficult though, monogamy kind of (at least in my observation/experience) tends to naturally provoke the possessive/jealous ways of thinking by its very character.

Thanks for the reply/welcome :)

NorCalK 11-15-2010 04:23 AM

Hey there! Nice to meet a fellow newcomer. And around my age, too! Hope to hear from you more in the future.

Jodi 11-15-2010 11:51 PM

hi. welcome. thanks 4 being so friendly & honest.

eklctc 11-17-2010 03:35 AM

Welcome to the forum. I hope things work out for you. It sounds like things can go a number of ways for you so I look forward to checking in on your journey.

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