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-   -   how do I deal with my heartbreak.. (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=42172)

jones 03-07-2013 11:28 PM

how do I deal with my heartbreak..
 
I'll try and recap everything, last year october B and J broke up with us ( me and my primary G)

I was the person who was blamed, this broke my heart, B said he couldn't not see one of us ( G ) and not the other person (me), I begged, pleaded for months for them both to talk to me but I got nothing but angry texts from them both but gaz got messages from J, she said I meant to much to her so she ignored me, it hurt her less.

how? would this really hurt less, knowing I was hurting and her knowing she was ignoring me really hurt me but still she carried on.

fastforward to now... G isn't allowed to see J alone ( B doesn't trust them both) but she can see me alone and I asked B if he wanted to see me for a drink and he ignored me and this was weeks ago.. G says I need to keep trying, keep texting but I can't, I had my birthday last year december, I saw her two days before my birthday so she knew but I didn't even get a happy birthday text but when she was dating G he got a card and present, I don't even get a text.

I keep seeing J text G and now she has agreed to have a msn date to talk, to which I am going out for so I can't be there while they just talk about eachother, G and J saw each other a few weeks ago B was there and she text him today saying she wished she could have put her arm around him etc but I don't get this.

this hurts so damn much, it seems like they don't even care how this is affecting me, G thinks its ok for me because I have A my bf but it is not easy it is just as heartbreaking, I want her to say she loves me or does she not love me anymore but she won't. I have lost someone who I thought my bestfriend and my girlfriend but it feels like I didn't mean anything to her...

learninginTN 03-08-2013 04:10 PM

Wow. I read your post twice, and I'm still not sure I understand all the dynamics. But suffice it to say this seems to be a mess of jealousy, insecurities, and heartache all the way around.

Perhaps it would be best for you and G to get away from this couple totally, and concentrate on other, more grounded and secure relationships.

jones 03-08-2013 05:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by learninginTN (Post 189238)
Wow. I read your post twice, and I'm still not sure I understand all the dynamics. But suffice it to say this seems to be a mess of jealousy, insecurities, and heartache all the way around.

Perhaps it would be best for you and G to get away from this couple totally, and concentrate on other, more grounded and secure relationships.

hi thanks for replying, sorry my post wasn't clear, it is a big mess and its hard to write it down.

I want to move on and not talk to them more B than J, I still love her so much, that is why it hurts so much. I would say our relationship outside this mess is very secure and happy, I do wish I never met them, the only thing I gained my A because they knew him and introduced us.

I spoke to J via text of course as I can't see her, told her how I feel and she said just because she doesn't text me doesn't mean she doesn't think about me.

I wish I could clear my head of all this mess and like G said don't let it bother me but it hurts.


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