Polyamory.com Forum

Polyamory.com Forum (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/index.php)
-   Introductions (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=9)
-   -   Hi new from Ohio (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=41940)

Bellabrisi 03-05-2013 02:22 AM

Hi new from Ohio
Hi im really new to all this I have been in a relationship with my male partner for 14 years and for the past 2 years he has had a online relationship with another female in which we both agreed we wanted. She is now with us here "real life" and im having some issues that im trying to overcome. So im just here looking for some inside help and maybe some questions to some of the feelings I'm having.

So glad I found this forum


kdt26417 03-05-2013 10:29 PM

Hello Bellabrisi,
Welcome to our forum.

Things are often different when something poly becomes "real life;" when it was online it was probably more like a hypothetical. Are you experiencing jealousy? insecurity? finding that your needs aren't being met, or that your male partner is caught up in NRE and spending less time with you?

Hope we can help in some way.
Kevin T.

Bellabrisi 03-06-2013 12:40 AM

I would say it's a little of everything you mentioned. Right now she is only here on a visit to see how things go. And don't get me wrong I think things are going well. I understand some of these things I'm feeling are normal, and honestly I've been trying to let them have some space because I know she is only here for a short time. Maybe I'm trying to confirm that these feelings are normal I really don't know. I do adore her and I'm sure she is maybe feeling a lot of the same. It's just the rush of feelings are so overwhelming. Thank you so much for responding.

kdt26417 03-06-2013 11:53 PM

No problem ... and just hang in there; things tend to be tougher during the early stages of a poly relationship. It gets easier, a little at a time. Part of it is everyone learning everyone's "tips and tricks," as well as getting better at communicating.

Hopefully you and this new female companion are getting some one-on-one time (can be platonic) also? That usually helps take the edge of the jealousy and competition mindset.

Keep us posted!
Kevin T.

polyq4 03-07-2013 12:07 PM

talk talk and more talk especially while you guys are together. tell them your feeling and tell them the good parts too....tell them you are learning to deal with those feelings.

All times are GMT. The time now is 09:38 PM.