Polyamory.com Forum

Polyamory.com Forum (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/index.php)
-   Poly Relationships Corner (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=4)
-   -   Broaching the topic (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=41011)

LastLion290 02-20-2013 06:32 AM

Broaching the topic
So, I've had a situation come up numerous times with several women in my life, and though thus far I've been able to handle it, it's always been a difficult thing to work out and finesse so that it is properly expressed.

I'm married. Love being love, I have yet to fall for someone who's openly poly, and often wind up being the one who points out to someone I'm fond of that this whole poly thing exists. So, an important step has to be taken.

Have any of you figured out ways to not feel as awkward when explaining that you're polyamorous and attracted to someone, for those of y'all who are already involved? It seems to add a whole new level of complexity and frustration on top of an already difficult situation, and though it may be common noob anxieties playing with me, it seems something worth discussing.

BreatheDeeply 02-20-2013 12:13 PM

I think you have to guage this based on your personal comfort level. I would not be comfortable telling someone who's not poly that I am poly. Mainly because I exist in a conservative environment and its really a matter of self-preservation. However, even if I lived in a non-judgemental community (if there is such a thing) I would probably still be hesitant.

Firstly - because what are the odds that they would be accepting of that? Probably not good.

Secondly - just when exactly would you tell someone that you're poly? No matter what point you are in the relationship, there's a strong possibility that its the wrong timing and you just come off looking like a fool.

Much easier to put the horse before the cart and make sure they're poly before contemplating a romantic relationship.


All times are GMT. The time now is 04:20 PM.