She's pregnant and...
 

Hi everyone, I recently got into a polyamorous relationship with this guy I really love. He's married and recently his wife got pregnant, now he wants NOTHING to do with me, won't talk to me, won't call me, won't text back, just shut me out completely :(. But then last night he comes over and wants sex! I'm wondering if he's really just cheating on his wife, any info/help? Please?

Red Flag -- Red Flag
 

Who cares whether he's cheating or not? Anyone who ignores your attempts to communicate, then shows up for sex, is SO not worth your time anyway. What would make you willing to put up with that sort of disrespectful treatment, cheater or no?

Generally, one would contact the spouse to confirm that someone is poly and everything is above board -- BEFORE getting involved.

But he sure sounds like a slime bag with how he treated you, so DTMFA.

Oh and...when he came over last night, did you give him what he wanted or ask him to leave? If you just let him fuck you, well then... I hope that, from now on, you work on building some self-esteem, creating personal boundaries, and standing up for yourself. Consider this a learning experience and move on.

Who is in a polyamorous relationship? All of you (you, him, his wife)? Or are you a polyamorous person dating a married man who is cheating on his wife? These are two VERY different situations.

Note: this is NYCs personal approach to meeting new people. The polyamorous people I know (myself included) do not require meetings with other partners to verify their cooperation.

Now, with the evidence you (original poster) have been given, I would STRONGLY suggest talking to your lover (not his wife) and if you think he's lying to you then leave him. If you think he's telling the truth then go with it.