Polyamory.com Forum

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-   -   New but not a newbie... (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=37559)

denjayone 01-17-2013 01:57 AM

New but not a newbie...
Hello to all from Central Jersey. I was told about this forum from a contact I made on OKcup.. I am not a newbie because I have been living the lifestyle (open marriage) for three years. I have found it somewhat difficult for males to be accepted by females in my situation when attempting to seek out an intimate relationship. I have been to the usual dating sites that I am sure most others on the forum have tried, I have better luck leaving my open marriage off the table when engaging in "cyber conversations" with other married females. I do not reach out to singles due to the high levels of angry responses.....(cheater, pond scum, home wrecker...ect) My wife on the other hand has a much easier time of finding potential dates, though mostly from her work environment. I do not have the type of work environment that would allow me to "test" the waters for potential intimate partners, and I consider it foolish to do at work as well. After reading the definitions page for this site, I realize that I also suffer from a partner who "roadblocks" my ability to meet others, often guilting me for cutting into family time for my own needs...(she sees her "friends" during work hours).......That is what brings me here, to explore and communicate with those who have been in my situation and have found a way to navigate away from the jealously bug that regularly bites my wife and is straining my ability to meet new and interesting people.

kdt26417 01-17-2013 05:02 PM

Hi denjayone,
Welcome to our forum.

Sorry to hear about the roadblocking your wife has been doing. You'll have to have a sit-down with her sometime and try to explain to her how you're feeling without being accusatory about it. If you could find a poly-friendly couples counselor in your area, that might be worth looking into. Something is sparking your wife's jealousy issues, and we don't yet know what that is.

It's tough finding someone who will associate with a poly guy (like you and me :)). Do you have any local poly groups in your area? Try googling "New Jersey polyamory" and see if anything turns up. Maybe if you and your wife could go together to attend poly meet-ups, her stance would improve on the situation.

I hope you will be able to find the help you're looking for here. Spend some time exploring our various threads, and post any thoughts or questions you may have.

Glad to have you aboard.
Kevin T.

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