Polyamory.com Forum

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-   -   Hello everone (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=35677)

UtahPolyCouple 12-24-2012 05:55 AM

Hello everone
Not really good at introductions, but here it goes.

So a little bit about us.

Nearly a year and a half ago, after 19 years of marriage, my wife and I decided it was time to redefine ourselves as a couple. We decided to open our marriage. We quickly discovered the beauty of Polyamory. The idea of loving many just called to us. It has been to us, an enlightenment beyond words. We find the poly community strong, supportive and kind.

So with that said, hello everyone.

C & D

Moose17 12-24-2012 06:02 AM

Hey, there,
Welcome to the Forum. I hope my wife and I find these changes as great as you guys have. We've been married 10 years, and happy with each other throughout, but we've only been talking about this for a few weeks now.

Was it as . . . scary for you guys at the beginning as it is for us sometimes?

UtahPolyCouple 12-24-2012 04:11 PM

Hi back
It was scary at first. But once we put jealousy and the fear that the other would find someone who they wanted to be with instead, we found it beautiful. We found that the human heart and mind are very comfortable with loving many. We found it a much more balanced way of living. We could and never would go back. We do keep our relationships as much in the poly community. We found it too difficult with those that just did not understand the lifestyle or us.

Moose17 12-24-2012 04:31 PM

Background on my situation
Here's where I'm at right now: http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...804#post173804

Still sometimes finding myself overwhelmed and scared. We seem to be able to communicate pretty clearly, though, and I know we're solid. It's like the first time you're in a major thunderstorm: you're a little freaked out, but you realize the house you're in has been there for many decades and withstood worse. We've handled bigger thunderstorms than this. This one just has a different color lightning or something, and it makes the windows rattle, throws different shadows.

I don't think we're going to branch out very far. We're very new to these ideas, but I still feel very mono, and my wife has been bi for a long time without wanting to be with anyone besides me until recently, and that was a very slow thing to develop.

UtahPolyCouple 12-25-2012 07:06 AM

Baby steps
I read your story with fascination. I find that trials and tribulations can either separate couples or make them stronger. I am so happy that it has made you two stronger. My wife and I have had some rather daunting trials in the 21 years that we have been together that have rocked the foundations of our marriage. Yes we emerged different, but much stronger. Our love has been tempered by it and is stronger that ever. But I do not think we could have done it without the sense of community. This is what eventually brought us to the Polyamory life. It is a nurturing and loving way that has carried us through much of the worst and shown us happy that we could have only imagined.

My friend, make your journey with baby steps. Make sure that with each step your marriage and love remain strong and true. Communication is so very important as is your love for each other.

C & D

kdt26417 12-25-2012 10:42 PM

Hello C & D,
Welcome to our forum.

If you live in Utah, then you're not far from my old stomping grounds (Provo Valley near A.F. Canyon). It is great that you have adapted so well to the idea of polyamory, and found the poly community supportive. I hope you'll enjoy your time on our site, and learn (and teach) much. I've been a member here for the better part of this year, and have grown and benefitted from the experience.

It's great to have you aboard; please dive right in. :)

Kevin T.

UtahPolyCouple 12-26-2012 06:34 AM

Thank you
Thank you for the warm welcome.

Yes we live very close to the mouth of AF canyon.

kdt26417 12-26-2012 11:02 PM

Heh, small world indeed. :D

Glad you're amongst us.

JDBinshadows 01-04-2013 06:34 PM

In Utah and still hiding
Hello C & D. I am here in this lovely RED state as well! I moved back here from CA for the wonderful outdoors. I was part of a poly relationship before I could even define it as such in the 90's then fell away from all that. I am currently struggling with who I am and am drawn more and more back to what I once had. Unfortunately my wife doesn't share that ambition so I balance where I can. I am happily married and don't want that to change. She knows of my "prior life" and understands that I miss it at times, but she grew up Mormon and has still held onto some of those values/morals (close-minded ones in my opinion).

But hello! And I guess I am new too.

kdt26417 01-04-2013 07:21 PM

Welcome JDB.

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