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-   -   Bright and Shiny New! (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=28084)

BrassValkyrie 09-06-2012 09:17 AM

Bright and Shiny New!
 
Hello, hello!
I'm the Brass Valkyrie. I'm nineteen years old, female and exceptionally new to polyamory. I think. I hope.
I've always been a very open-minded person, so when I got out of my previous relationship (with one man) and was asked out by a married poly couple, I figured it was worth trying. Both of my partners are bi, and so am I, but in different ways. The guy (J) is straight down the middle, but his wife (C) has a definite feminine preferences.
There are a few things in the relationship that make me feel awkward. Some of the biggest things are the age gaps. J is seven years older than me, C is five. I feel like they're further into their lives, and I get a constant third-wheel feeling, since they've been together twelve years.
Another issue, a much larger one is that while I'm bi as well, I definitely like guys more. Topping off that, I have a lot more in common with J than C. I care for them both deeply, so I'm constantly worrying about keeping everything equal.
I think the thing that could bring the whole happy house of cards down though is that I'm not 100% sure about polyamory. And since I do care for J and C, I'm always worrying I'll realise being poly isn't for me and break their hearts.
So that's my poly in a nutshell! I hope that I haven't bothered anyone with my wall of text, but it's good to be here with all the resources I could need.

kdt26417 09-06-2012 09:47 PM

Hi Brass Valkyrie,
Welcome to our forum.

It is totally up to you to decide whether polyamory is the lovestyle for you; some people are "naturally monogamous" and that's okay.

Don't worry too much about making things exactly equal between you, J, and C. Triads are rarely "perfectly balanced."

I hope your time spent here on Polyamory.com will give you a better idea about how to approach things, and that you'll find new friends. There is so much to read here, and so many people to meet.

Glad you could be here; hope your relationships work out well.

Sincerely,
Kevin T.

Avatar 09-07-2012 08:59 PM

Welcome, oh shiny one


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