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-   -   Everybody All at Once (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=27560)

busbuddha 08-29-2012 07:52 PM

Everybody All at Once
 
Taking a quick break from code monkeying at work to intro myself now that Skye and Avatar have...and I'm stealing what they said and editing it further! LOL

Hi there. I am a guy who is part of a quad with my wife, whose username I'm not aware of on here, of 10 years and another married couple. We have been on and off quadded for the past two-ish years, but have remained best friends throughout. She and I have one child and Skye & Avatar have two kids about a decade apart. I am the biological father of their youngest (call it a gift, call it sperm donation, whichever) but they are the primary caregivers.

We are basically out to all our families and there's been a mix of support and disapproval.

The four of us, plus our three kids, are utterly, and completely, chosen family and this will never change.

Our personal arrangements allow for outside, agreed upon, partners. We have a hierarchy within the quad that our married partners are priority. I am lovers with the other female of the quad, but not sexually intimate with Avatar. Does that make a letter or a shape? I'm not sure...maybe a W. We're a W. Wait, no, that takes 5 people....

I'm really just looking to discuss and learn about the various ways we all do this and handle the different challenges we face.

So, hey y'all! What's up? :D

MusicalRose 08-29-2012 09:52 PM

Hello and welcome. I think I saw one of your partner's topics just yesterday. I am currently in a V with two males who are each able to date around to other people. I am able to date around, but not really looking at the moment, as we are still trying to establish a comfort zone amongst the three of us.

busbuddha 08-29-2012 09:55 PM

Hey there. Yes, I think you were Skye's first response, too. :)

Jade 08-30-2012 02:34 AM

Welcome:) What does "on and off quadded" mean?

busbuddha 08-30-2012 02:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jade (Post 151343)
Welcome:) What does "on and off quadded" mean?

Well, it's basically an English major who turns quad into a part of speech it should never be! LOL

No, actually, the four of us started dating in 2010 and then things kind of stalled and we took a little bit of a step back but remained close friends throughout. And then, earlier this summer, we revisited our relationships and came to the consensus that, yeah, we definitely love each other and want to be formally committed to each other. So...on and off quadded.

At least we don't own ATVs! Then we'd be a quad on quads! ;)

krysjah 08-30-2012 11:12 AM

My husband and I have just recently started something similar with another couple. We've been in an open marriage for a little over 2 years now, but the quad thing is new and definitely exciting.

Any advice you want to pass on to a newbie?

busbuddha 08-30-2012 02:49 PM

Oh lawd! I feel like we're still kinda noobs at it, too. Communicate constantly. Get everyone on one Google Calendar (the official calendar of poly folk everywhere!).

Congrats on finding another couple, btw! :D

MusicalRose 08-30-2012 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by busbuddha (Post 151345)
Well, it's basically an English major who turns quad into a part of speech it should never be! LOL

No, actually, the four of us started dating in 2010 and then things kind of stalled and we took a little bit of a step back but remained close friends throughout. And then, earlier this summer, we revisited our relationships and came to the consensus that, yeah, we definitely love each other and want to be formally committed to each other. So...on and off quadded.

At least we don't own ATVs! Then we'd be a quad on quads! ;)

XD

This made me giggle.

busbuddha 08-30-2012 03:51 PM

There's a clear reason Skye got me a shirt that reads "I Speak in Puns!"

kdt26417 08-30-2012 11:03 PM

Hello busbuddha,
Welcome to our forum, to you and your entire quad.

Whatever way we can be of help, just let us know. You should find a pretty supportive community here.

Don't know if your quad makes a letter, maybe it makes a box with a slash? :)

Anyway, glad you could join us.
Sincerely,
Kevin T.


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