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-   -   When things are good.... (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=2752)

2rings 05-10-2010 03:07 PM

When things are good....
 
On this site, I've read alot about people going through different kinds of relationship drama. I guess it's to be expected due to the complicated nature of our relationships and the outside stresses put on them. Unfortunately, my relationships are no exception. Our drama is posted here too. We've definitely had our share. But despite the frequent setbacks, I'm generally optomistic about making my poly relationship with Kattails and Morning glory work. It hasn't been smooth. I have felt more extremes in the past year than ever before. Complete joy has turned to absolute despair to cautious optomism and back to joy in just a day's time on more than a few occasions. The ups and downs can be hellish, but obviously there is something so very good about the good times that keeps us coming back. Why else would we bother? For me, when things are good, both MG and KT are happy. And that makes me very happy too. The times that the three of us have been together left me with a smile plastered on my face that I thought would never leave. And really, it was less about the sex (which was outstanding, of course) than the feeling that we had finally made it to a place, if just for a moment, of understanding, cooperation and respect. Of course, after each of those times, jealousy, mistrust, and disappointment burst the bubble of euphoria in which I was floating. Coming down hurt, but that little taste of what could be has kept me working hard to find a way for this to happen. I think it can.
I'm feeling pretty good today, so finish this line for me-
When things are good.....

MonoVCPHG 05-10-2010 03:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2rings (Post 29114)
When things are good.....

I think ups and downs are more the norm than the exception at first 2rings.
Here's how I once explained it to Redpepper.
http://www.polyamory.com/forum/album...&pictureid=321

Take care
Mono

2rings 05-10-2010 03:48 PM

I expect ups and downs, I just wish that they weren't so extreme.

2rings 05-10-2010 03:50 PM

Also, if any mods come across this thread, I probably should have posted it in general discussions instead. Please move it when you can. Thanks.

KatTails 05-10-2010 04:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2rings (Post 29114)
I have felt more extremes in the past year than ever before. Complete joy has turned to absolute despair to cautious optomism and back to joy in just a day's time on more than a few occasions. The ups and downs can be hellish, but obviously there is something so very good about the good times that keeps us coming back. Why else would we bother? For me, when things are good, both MG and KT are happy. And that makes me very happy too. The times that the three of us have been together left me with a smile plastered on my face that I thought would never leave. And really, it was less about the sex (which was outstanding, of course) than the feeling that we had finally made it to a place, if just for a moment, of understanding, cooperation and respect. Of course, after each of those times, jealousy, mistrust, and disappointment burst the bubble of euphoria in which I was floating. Coming down hurt, but that little taste of what could be has kept me working hard to find a way for this to happen. I think it can.
I'm feeling pretty good today, so finish this line for me- When things are good.....

......each of us is getting their needs met, no one person feels left out or slighted and there is communication and respect between all three of us. A breakdown in any of those things - we crash.

Baby - I know that I am responsible for a majority, if not all, of our "hellish" times. For that - I am sorry to you both. After both times the three of us were together, it was me who melted down. It was my jealousy of seeing you two together that set me off. It has been my insecurities and my feelings of inadequacies that have hurt you and MG. I am working on those negative emotions.

I know that the love that we have is incredibly strong and will carry us through anything. I know the love between you and MG is strong enough that you need this to work. I know the love that MG and I feel for you is strong enough that we will do whatever it takes to make you happy. I hope that MG and I can start building up our relationship so that together, we are strong enough to make this work.

Hang in there - these hard times will be worth it in the end. I promise!

Don't give up on me! I love you - incredibly!

Kat

Ariakas 05-10-2010 04:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2rings (Post 29114)
On this site, I've read alot about people going through different kinds of relationship drama. I guess it's to be expected due to the complicated nature of our relationships and the outside stresses put on them. Unfortunately, my relationships are no exception. Our drama is posted here too. We've definitely had our share. But despite the frequent setbacks, I'm generally optomistic about making my poly relationship with Kattails and Morning glory work. It hasn't been smooth. I have felt more extremes in the past year than ever before. Complete joy has turned to absolute despair to cautious optomism and back to joy in just a day's time on more than a few occasions. The ups and downs can be hellish, but obviously there is something so very good about the good times that keeps us coming back. Why else would we bother? For me, when things are good, both MG and KT are happy. And that makes me very happy too. The times that the three of us have been together left me with a smile plastered on my face that I thought would never leave. And really, it was less about the sex (which was outstanding, of course) than the feeling that we had finally made it to a place, if just for a moment, of understanding, cooperation and respect. Of course, after each of those times, jealousy, mistrust, and disappointment burst the bubble of euphoria in which I was floating. Coming down hurt, but that little taste of what could be has kept me working hard to find a way for this to happen. I think it can.
I'm feeling pretty good today, so finish this line for me-
When things are good.....

Reading your story is a little like a flashback. I appreciate you coming on here and opening up :)

The way I described what you seem to go through was finding that pinnacle made everything in my life feel brighter. Everything seemed more colourful, and I just felt...RIGHT...

I will say this, regardless of the relationship, there are ups and downs. One of the things I learned from my initial foray into poly. I intend to reign in the highs a little more so the lows don't hit quite so hard :) (I say that now hahaha)

Morningglory629 05-10-2010 07:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ariakas (Post 29127)
I will say this, regardless of the relationship, there are ups and downs. One of the things I learned from my initial foray into poly. I intend to reign in the highs a little more so the lows don't hit quite so hard :) (I say that now hahaha)

Oh no you won't...when the feeling comes along again, as it will, you will jump head first and there will be no reigning in the highs...what's the point of dealing with the lows if you aren't experienceing the exhiliration of the high...even the warm, fuzzy, calm has it's own high. Love with abandon!;)

LovingRadiance 05-10-2010 07:30 PM

When things are good there is a peacefulness, a sense of "rightness", a comfortableness.

When things are good we work together like a well-oiled machine. All of the work gets done smoothly and easily and we find ourselves comfortable hanging out and enjoying the aftermath.

When things are good we look up and see one another and the smile on our face doesn't break.

When things are good we remember the times when things were bad and they seem trivial, silly, small-minded.

Morningglory629 05-10-2010 07:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2rings (Post 29114)
but that little taste of what could be has kept me working hard to find a way for this to happen. I think it can.
I'm feeling pretty good today, so finish this line for me-
When things are good.....

You have never spoken truer words... well, maybe when you said Penelope is no Poppy! LOL!:D

So when things are good...time flies by and the happiness is surreal. I am definitely addicted!:)

Ariakas 05-10-2010 07:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Morningglory629 (Post 29157)
Oh no you won't...when the feeling comes along again, as it will, you will jump head first and there will be no reigning in the highs...what's the point of dealing with the lows if you aren't experienceing the exhiliration of the high...even the warm, fuzzy, calm has it's own high. Love with abandon!;)

Ideally the lows don't quite drop as low...

But ya, if I find it again, my intellect will want to control the emotion...but its a rough battle :)...


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