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jallenhayslett 04-27-2010 11:54 PM

Hi All
 
New to Poly here.

Been in a mono relationship for 1.5 years. Picked up a copy of Ethical Slut a year ago but never read it while I was in my mono. I recently broke up with my mono and decided to read through. After reading I know what attracted me to the book in the first place. This sings to me in a way I haven't been able to vocalize for years.

I label myself as bi, only privately and to the closest of friends, but definitely have a propensity towards women. I guess you could say my standards for the men I would consider sharing myself with are pretty high, as are my standards for women. I described my sexuality to one friend at one time as being tied to whomever I am with at the time. If I am with a male, then I am gay. If I am with a female, then I am straight. Call it what you want it. I prefer both at different times.

That being said, the one thing that attracted me to the book to begin with was the idea that, much like a group of friends, I can find fulfillment from each one of them, but on a much deeper level and for different parts of myself. There is barely a sliver within me that is content with sharing myself with one person. I find that a circle of relationships is crucial to a fulfilling life. Imagine "Friends" only a lot less monogamy and a lot more freedom. Yes, I just made a "Friends" reference.

So that's a scratch on the surface. I'm embarking on a new journey. Things will get deeper as they go.

Ariakas 04-29-2010 04:50 PM

Welcome to the forum :)

idealist 04-29-2010 09:08 PM

Welcome !! I am a 52 year old female and I consider myself bisexual too. I was in a 12 year monogamous lesbian relationship and I've been in 4 hetro relationships with guys which all lasted an average of 2 to 3 years each. I've only "come out" to myself as poly recently (within the last 3 months) and realize that I've been working my way to this lifestyle for many many years.....I also read The Ethical Slut and I resonated with it very much as well. I found this forum and have really been enjoying the sharing. It's helping me to wrap my brain around this!! ;)


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