Polyamory.com Forum

Polyamory.com Forum (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/index.php)
-   Poly Relationships Corner (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/forumdisplay.php?f=4)
-   -   thinking about a girlfriend (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=26223)

mlkjwhite 08-06-2012 04:22 AM

thinking about a girlfriend
 
We are looking for peoples opinions on how this all works out with married couples wanting to look for a relationship with another woman. We want more the sexual part. we have a been married 9 years and this is what we want. Who has lived this life style and it work? and where do we meet ladies who would want a relationship with a couple? thanks for any help you can give us

CielDuMatin 08-06-2012 03:06 PM

Hi there - thanks for asking.

If you want a relationship that is really just about the sex, then you need to be looking at swinger forums online - most of the polyamory forums will be talking primarily about loving, romantic relationships (which of course can include sex - sometimes lots of it!).

So if it's someone to have regular threesomes with without anything else, really, other than a friendship, your ways of finding them are a lot different from a full-blown romantic relationship between you.

The other thing to think about is what happens if you meet a girl and it totally "clicks" with her and your wife, but less so with you and her? (Or the other way around).

Lots of things to get sorted out in terms of what you do and don't want - the more you and your partner can work on before you meet another, the less drama and disappointment you are going to face, and the less time you are going to waste...

mlkjwhite 08-08-2012 07:37 PM

looking
 
Hello we are wanting way more than the sex part of it .we have talked about this fir a long time now and we have decided that if we click we are hoping to click all together and, we have to be open with one another we been married for 9 years and she is a great wife and my best friend we have had the random hook up but we want more than just the sex. She wants nothing to do with a guy only females this life style is heard we know and just don't know where to turn to meet like minded females looking for long term relationship any ideas where to find ladies that live or looking for this life style thanks for any help I can get thanks

CielDuMatin 08-08-2012 08:14 PM

So I'm not sure where you are located, but one option to meet folks is to join a local poly group. If you give us a rough idea where you are, folks may be able to tell you if there is an active group nearby.

So, "far more" than sex - presumably this means being in love, and having a committed relationship? I'm going to ask my second question again - what if your wife meets this woman and they fall in love, but you and this other woman just don't "click" - what happens then?

LovingRadiance 08-08-2012 08:44 PM

Whilst considering Ciel's very important and pertinent question-search "unicorns" and read.
Because the simple answer to your question is-it's very difficult to find a woman who wants that and will fit your pre-defined wishes. Because-we're unique individuals and the women you meet will have their own needs, desires and preferences.

mlkjwhite 08-08-2012 10:26 PM

looking
 
Hello we are in NE Ohio located in Warren
We are very close and want the same things out
Of life and out of a lady I strongly feel that if we choose the right
Person we will fall for her together and if not we have decided we
Would deal or talk about it then at the time but we both want the same thinga
So not sure we would get close enough to the person if they wasn't what we was looking
for I hope this helps all honest opinions help thanks

LovingRadiance 08-08-2012 10:45 PM

That's awesome.

But-what if you find a woman who you both adore and she only adores one of you and likes the other......

mlkjwhite 08-08-2012 10:59 PM

looking
 
Haha to be honest that's not what we are looking for so we are looking at this as any other dating problem and break it off. If we was just dating one on one if its not what we want we wouldn't be happy so no reason to move on make sense?

LovingRadiance 08-08-2012 11:05 PM

yes. it makes sense. but it's so commonly unfulfillable there is a whole area of poly dedicated to conversations about couples looking for a "hot bi babe" also referred to as a unicorn-as in, very unlikely to find it because its probably imaginary....

I'm NOT saying it's impossible.
I am saying-you could get a LOT of information on the topic you are inquiring about-simply by typing "unicorn" into the search engine for this site. Good information-but possibly not all enjoyable info.

LovingRadiance 08-08-2012 11:18 PM

sampling of threads on this topic there's 300 more....
 
http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...light=unicorns

http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...light=unicorns

http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...light=unicorns

http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...light=unicorns

http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...light=unicorns

http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...light=unicorns

http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...light=unicorns

http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...light=unicorns


http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...light=unicorns

http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...light=unicorns

http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showt...light=unicorns


All times are GMT. The time now is 02:09 PM.