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-   -   Feeling a little overwhelmed (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=25154)

Maebe 06-28-2012 07:11 PM

Feeling a little overwhelmed
 
I think I just need someone to talk too that has been Poly for a while. Someone to bounce things off of and get some feedback from. I would prefer it be someone I have little chance of ever meeting in person so I wouldn't feel like I have to always wonder what they would think if they actually met me (or hubby). A friend or mentor or sounding board or hell, someone to rant to now and then...lol.

CherryBlossomGirl 06-28-2012 07:37 PM

Poly Friends
 
Have you thought of joining a local Poly group? There are often groups of people who will get together to socialize and talk, have discussions on particular topics, etc. Failing that, posting here and on reddit usually helps connect you with other poly folks.

Tonberry 06-28-2012 08:08 PM

Sounds to me like this forum is just that. Or does it need to be only one specific person?

Maebe 06-28-2012 08:11 PM

Yes
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by BaggagePatrol (Post 141382)
Have you thought of joining a local Poly group? There are often groups of people who will get together to socialize and talk, have discussions on particular topics, etc. Failing that, posting here and on reddit usually helps connect you with other poly folks.

We have joined several local poly groups and we go to educational gatherings and meeting.

I am looking more for a friend that I can share those irrational PMS type moments with. Someone to be sympathetic but at the same time honest. It's hard to rant about your SO or your OSO to people who know them or may get to know them. I don't want to color someones opinion that might become a part of their life someday. I hope that makes sense. Kind of like blowing off steam to your best friend, only my best friend in RL is my hubby's sister and they have a tense relationship as it is, so going there isn't a good option.

Maebe 06-28-2012 08:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tonberry (Post 141390)
Sounds to me like this forum is just that. Or does it need to be only one specific person?

I would prefer a one-on-one friend type exchange. I really like reading the forums, but I'm not really an extravert and I cringe at the thought of putting my personal moments of crazy out there for the world to view...lol

I'm usually a really laid back person and it's rare for me to get overly emotional about much, but it would be really nice to have someone I could consider a go to person for those times when things just get really hard.

I'm a great listener too, so I would hope the support would be considered a two way street. :)

SNeacail 06-28-2012 08:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Maebe (Post 141392)
Kind of like blowing off steam to your best friend, only my best friend in RL is my hubby's sister and they have a tense relationship as it is, so going there isn't a good option.

Time to put some effort into finding some friends outside of your relationship with your husband. I completely understand this and spent 19 years in that place. It's extremely draining and has a more detrimental effect than we realize. It took me over a year to get involved in some activities that I enjoyed and were completely separate from my husband. Not that he can't join in if he wanted to, but it's just not something he's all that into and he has his own stuff. Through these activities, I gained some awesome friends, that are MY friends and I don't have to worry how my venting my effect their view of my husband.

opalescent 06-28-2012 09:29 PM

As you read and perhaps post here, you might develop online friends who could fulfill some of that sounding board need. You do not need to be a raving extrovert to do that.


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