Newbie from OR
My name is Cecilia and I'm new to being poly but already know it's a great fit for me.
I currently have one romantic partner along with at least one FWB (the number sometimes fluctuates).
I'm still unsure of how my romantic relationship will proceed (only 3 weeks in) but I feel a very deep connection with my partner. And it's actually a huge relief to me that I'm still free to have play partners because at 21, I have a nearly inexhaustible sex drive and can only see my bf once or twice a week. At the same time, I've noticed that I've been feeling some jealousy towards one of my bf's sweeties. I know it's not just because he's with her since I get along well with the his live in sweetie.
I'm pretty sure it's because based on what he's told me, his relationship with her is on thin ice and I just want him to get out of the relationship and save himself the drama... Sadly, knowing the reason behind my jealousy when he spends time with her isn't helping me out very much. Hopefully, this situation will be resolved in the next month or so...
I'm also really having to address my insecurities. In the past, not hearing from a boyfriend for more then a day almost always meant that he was cheating on me. Now, I'm having issues with thinking "I'm not good enough for him" whenever he goes more then 12 hours without sending me a text. Logically, I know it's because he's a very busy guy and he just sometimes can't make the time to respond to a text... but those little doubts keep on eating at me.
This also leads me back to my constant self doubt. I've noticed that when I first enter a romantic relationship, I have a tendency to constantly doubt that I'm worthy of my partner for any variety of reasons. The big one these days is my weight since I'm quite a bit overweight. The other big reason is because I was always told I wasn't good enough for anyone when I was growing up.
Well, I'm going to stop ranting now... I really just meant to say hi!
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