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-   -   Philosophical Semantics, Part III (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=23943)

kdt26417 05-24-2012 07:26 AM

Philosophical Semantics, Part III
Going by internal orientation, external circumstances, or both: How would you classify yourself at this moment?
  • Very (about 90-100%) polyamorous.
  • Moderately (about 66-75%) polyamorous.
  • Very (about 90-100%) monogamous.
  • Moderately (about 66-75%) monogamous.
  • Half monogamous, half polyamorous (about 50%/50%).
  • Both monogamous and polyamorous (about 100%/100%).
  • Neither monogamous nor polyamorous (about 0%/0%).
  • I wouldn't classify myself as any of the above.
Any detail you could go into for your answer would be appreciated (i.e., why did you pick that answer).

Prequel threads:
Philosophical Semantics, Part I
Philosophical Semantics, Part II

Sequel thread:
Philosophical Semantics, Part IV

kdt26417 05-24-2012 07:57 AM

I voted very (about 90-100%) polyamorous. It was a tough call; I considered moderately (about 66-75% polyamorous). I think I'm about 85% polyamorous, perhaps 90%. Under good conditions, I'm probably able to live an a monogamous setting and be happy enough. But I really like polyamorous principles, and strongly desire to be a part of them in day-to-day life. My situation is "very polyamorous" because we have an all-primary structure; lots of emotional involvement and tons of commitment (between the three of us).

"Amount of polyamory/monogamy" is very difficult to quantify. These survey questions attempt to cut through the math and make intuitive judgments. Further discussion on this topic is welcome, for those who are interested.

nycindie 05-24-2012 08:08 AM

I thought about voting "I wouldn't classify myself as any of the above," but then I saw "neither monogamous nor polyamorous" and voted that way because the poll is asking how I would classify myself, and I do not buy into the whole polyamorous/monogamous orientation idea. To me, the terms only describe structures for relationships. I am just a person and I may call myself a polyamorist, as a way to represent what I practice or strive for in my life, but not polyamorous as a personal orientation.

JaneQSmythe 05-24-2012 01:46 PM

I waffled on this one. In general I view mono vs. poly as describing relationships not people. On the other hand if one is open to more than one romantic relationship at a time, even if they are in NO relationships currently, then I would still think of them as "poly". (Kind of like I think someone can be gay/straight/bi even if they are currently celibate).

I picked moderately poly for me - I'm happy in my current poly relationship but for long stretches of my life I was just with MrS and was perfectly happy with that as well (open to but not actively seeking other relationships).


kdt26417 05-24-2012 02:51 PM

@ all so far: Thx for your votes and explanations. There's all kinds of valid approaches to the question: internal orientation, present circumstances, neither, both. I tried to set up the question (and available answers) to be as accomodating as possible.

Polyamory/polyamorist do seem to be more situation-based words than polyamorous (which generally seems like a more orientation-based word).

ThatGirlInGray 05-25-2012 04:27 AM

I had a hard time choosing too, because I'm not sure what "polyamorous" is supposed to encompass in this case. I'm definitely non-monogamous/open, but I've never sought out multiple romantic relationships. At the moment I'm poly because I developed a deeper relationship with my FWB, but if something were to happen to one of my partners (heaven forbid!) I don't think I'd go looking for someone else to have this type of relationship structure with. It's what works for us so I can have both of them as a part of my life, but I think it ONLY works for us because it's these two people. Remove either one of them and I'm no longer poly (yes, the rewards are worth it but GOD is poly a lot of work!).

So I chose 66-75% poly.

NovemberRain 05-25-2012 04:42 AM

I chose moderately poly because I have two men; but I don't have to share them with anyone else.

kdt26417 05-25-2012 07:19 PM

Both those votes sound reasonable to me. :)

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