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-   -   Leasing partners, rather than buying partners (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=23141)

redpepper 04-18-2012 08:06 PM

Leasing partners, rather than buying partners
Oh man. I like this article. I like that its realistic!

Relationships: 10 Reasons Why You Should Lease, Not Buy

LadyKane 04-18-2012 08:57 PM

I loved this. This is awesome. Especially "7) You don’t know who the love of your life is until the last day of your life. Each bond is for different purposes." So accurate. Bookmarked!

Thanks for sharing :D

opalescent 04-18-2012 09:12 PM

Hey, member Scott, did you write the article RP has linked to?

Some of the language used seems very similar to yours. Particularly the 'matrimonial prostitution' phrasing. Also the use of money, buying and selling, as metaphors to describe various aspects of romantic relationships is something that you tend to use quite a bit.

Curious to know!

RainyGrlJenny 04-19-2012 07:41 PM

I have to say, I don't love some of the feelings the article evokes in me. When I rent or lease something, I'm going into it with the idea that it's a temporary situation. While I don't believe every relationship will last forever, and don't believe they should, I do feel like I shouldn't hold back my investment in it, looking at the end before I even start the beginning. I know that's not what the article is trying to say, but that's the way it makes me feel.

Perhaps it's just not a metaphor that resonates with me.

On a sillier note, now I have "I'll Cover You" from Rent stuck in my head :) It doesn't quite fit perfectly in sentiment, but the wording has given me an earworm!

Live in my house
I'll be your shelter
Just pay me back
with one thousand kisses
Be my lover
and I'll cover you

Open your door
I'll be your tenant
Don't got much baggage to lay at your feet
But sweet kisses I've got to spare
I'll be there and I'll cover you

I think they meant it
When they said you can't buy love
Now I know you can rent it
A new lease you are my love
on life Be my life

Vixtoria 04-20-2012 12:28 AM

Over all a decent article. However, it was way too, 'what will be will be' for me. It's a mindset I just roll my eyes at to be honest. The phrase doesn't work from either end IMHO.


Mono mindset - "If we are meant to be then we will be! One day my Prince will come!"

Poly mindset - "The relationship didn't work out because of them, or because it wasn't meant to be!"

I've seen the excuse used too often, and quite often on the poly/mono list, that people keep having relationships end because they weren't meant to be. When you go through partners like tissue paper it may not be because of karma or because it 'wasn't meant to be!', maybe you just need to work on some relationship skills yourself.

Tonberry 04-21-2012 12:51 AM

I always thought it would be more sense nowadays for things like marriage to be not indefinite, but for, say, 3 years renewable. Easy to renew, and if you don't want to, you're not married anymore.
I realise it's more complicated than that because of shared properties, children, etc. But it still seems it would be more suited for humans.

newtoday 04-21-2012 01:03 AM


Originally Posted by redpepper (Post 133095)
Oh man. I like this article. I like that its realistic!

Relationships: 10 Reasons Why You Should Lease, Not Buy

Love this article! Thanks for sharing RP!

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