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-   -   New To All Of This (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=23015)

TCampbel 04-12-2012 06:42 PM

New To All Of This
Hi my name is Terri. I am VERY new to this idea of polyamory and find myself in a position of really needing to contemplate what it entails and how to present it to my partners.

A friend of mine gave me a great book to read and I want to learn more, especially how best to manage the discussion with my primary partner. We've been together for 16 years and I love her deeply, but I have also fallen in love with another woman. Hopefully, I'll learn lots here.


CielDuMatin 04-12-2012 07:07 PM

Welcome, Terri.

I think that quite a number of us have been in a position quite similar to yours. There have been many mistakes...er... "learning opportunities" that have occurred along the way and we are all very much the wiser because of it.

I really wish that there had been a resource like this when I started realising that "something was wrong" - I initially thought it was something wrong with me. I know I would have made a LOT less mistakes and hurt a lot fewer people as a consequence.

Please feel free to talk about your own situation as much as you feel comfortable, and solicit opinions. I think there are many that hang out here in the hopes that they can help others not fall down the same rabbit holes that we did... :-)

km34 04-12-2012 07:36 PM

Welcome! What book are you reading? :) If you're interested in more reading material, there is a whole thread on book and website recommendations! This is also a great place to get feedback if you are in a situation that isn't like the ones already discussed around here.

TCampbel 04-12-2012 08:38 PM

Thanks for the warm welcome
I will continue to look around and see exactly were to begin posting. The book was "Polyamory" by Ravenscroft. It seems to be a great introduction to the topic. Thanks for pointing out the reading list... I'm an academic and love to read!!

Thanks again!

kdt26417 04-13-2012 10:22 PM

Hello Terri,
Welcome to our forum.

Another book I've heard *very highly* recommended (I haven't read it yet, but probably will soon) is "Opening Up: creating and sustaining open relationships," by Tristan Taormino. Something to look into perhaps.

We're all newbies at poly when it comes right down to it; it's such a "new" lifestyle and one has to dig to find the support for it (let alone the research on it).

But you should be able to find some good friends and good company here.

Welcome aboard ...
Kevin T.

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