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-   -   Love the Idea... (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=2281)

BruinJer 03-06-2010 07:23 AM

Love the Idea...
 
of being in a poliamorous relationship but want the commitment with all involved... is that too much to ask? I'm new to this lifestyle but then again... I want this deep down!

Twill 03-06-2010 03:55 PM

BruinJer,

I, like you, am new to all of this. But it sounds like you want the same things that I do. Not just casual play, but real, committed, long-term relationships with more than one partner.

Based on the reading I've done on this forum and other places, you'll find that there are as many different kinds of polyamorous relationships as there are polyamorous people. For those of us that are looking for commitments from all partners, there are certainly possibilities.

For example, I recently met two people who are looking for a third person to join their marriage, creating a relationship structure that I've heard people refer to as a "triad." That is, all three members are committed to each other as equal partners in the relationship.

Any kind of polyamorous relationship can be "closed" (no play/relationships with outsiders) or "open." Personally, I'm looking for a "closed" polyamorous relationship. That's not to say that there might be another person that joins the group in the future, but simply that there aren't any casual encounters with members outside the group. I would be comfortable in a larger group as well, and would love exploring a "group marriage" someday, that involved five or six or more people. But that's just me.

Basically, to sum this all up, I'll just pass on the wisdom I've gleaned from others:

1. As I said, there are many kinds of polyamorous relationships.

And 2. It's very important to be communicative with others about what kind of relationship you want.

ImaginaryIllusion 03-06-2010 03:57 PM

Welcome to the Forum BruinJer.

Quote:

Originally Posted by BruinJer (Post 23656)
but want the commitment with all involved.

I'm curious exactly what you mean by this part. Is it that you want all your partners to be poly? Are you looking for two partners who are also committed to each other? I'm not exactly clear on your meaning.

RickPlus 03-07-2010 12:43 AM

Hi Bruinjer,
I found your post so short, it is hard for me to understand what is going on. With no sense of the dynamics, and not clearly understanding what you mean by commitment, it is very hard to offer anything useful to you.

Warm regards, Rick.


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