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-   -   adventure on the horizon (http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=2273)

shagra 03-05-2010 06:45 PM

adventure on the horizon
 
Hi everyone! maow!

I'm an art-loving guy from toronto and i live with my girlfriend of almost two years (M). We've lived together ever since we became romantically involved and have always been kindred spirits seeing eye to eye through eye yummmmmers. i love her very much and have felt the greatest love of my life with her. She understands me very much and is my best friend. She started living with me when i was staying in a house with some friends, and since september we have been living at our own apartment together with our wonderful cat, pepe. We tried some threesomes with some boys some months ago and realized that sexin' with no love doesn't make us feel good.

I haven't really been in any substantial relationships before except for one that was birthed online with a girl from the states (E). We were young, about 5 years ago, and frequented forums where we posted poetry and got to be great friends, moving our correspondence to IM and text messaging, couple of letters, phone calls... Our relationship became sexually charged and quite intimate.

When I got together with M, i didn't continue talking with E in the same manner/frequency. I understand now that the NRE was in super-high gear and that relationship eclipsed everything in my life, including school, friends, etc. I still talked with E, but not like we did before. As time went on, we got closer again, sparks began to fly, and it was like old times.. M found some messages and was upset/jealous, but since then we have worked those issues out very well. I revisited the idea of polyamory and realized that it was a way of life that i wanted to tread.

E + I started webcamming sporadically, which we had never done before, and talking a lot on msn. M said that she wondered why i'd never gone to meet E and that i couldn't really know the dynamic until i did meet her.

So, I have plane tickets to E's university town and am going to meet her next week. I am EXCITED! However, I know that it will be hard for M. We will miss each other and i will be with another lover. I have faith in our relationship and am committed to realizing each other's potential however possible. The foundation and any insecurity in the relationship will be tested. I believe in us and am working on that premise.

Any tips, ideas, suggestions, comments?
Is there anything I can do or suggest so that the time apart will be good? She seems to be happy for me, but I know that it will probably be difficult.

Thanks for reading.
Will update as the adventures continue!
Peace and love.

Magdlyn 02-17-2011 05:21 PM

Hi shagra. In the daily chat thread you seemed to be implying M has a local bf too?

shagra 02-17-2011 06:19 PM

hiya

first to continue the thread which i forgot about::
i went to see E, it was sweet. seems like i broke her heart due to what she expected, but i want to be her friend forever. different kind of spark than imagined, different kind of vibe. we're awesome though, talk often, are super close.

the local boyfriend is new, about a month in the making. we'll call him J.
i met him about a year ago, we played a show together, we played music together once every 1-2 months for the last year or so. I invited M along to the sessions at his house, she laid in an inflatable boat as we shot into space.
they love each other.
my friendship with J has been based on a few lines here and there and hours of playing. I haven't played with him since they got together, too much to process. too many belly jumps and structures i need to work out.

here and there it overwhelms
i feel good usually


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